Finding You (Dublin Sisters #1)

Chapter 11

Content Warning: Slight mature scene

Ramlah

The small flat was bustling with young girls and women. Laughter and merriment could be heard. Girls were adorning henna on their hands. Women were gossiping over a cup of tea. Mithai and muffins were being shared among them. The atmosphere was of happiness, festivity but what was I feeling? Frightened, hopelessness and anxiety.

I sat frozen as my hands and feet were being decorated in henna designs by my closest friends. I remorsefully scanned the room. No one knew what was hidden in my heart. I felt I was being sacrificed, manipulated and used for the worldly gains. There was a constant ache. I was still hesitant whether this was the right decision. I had not expressed my inner chaotic battle to anyone not even to my closest friends or sisters. Everyone thought I was in a shock to have a quick wedding. Nobody realised that I was being forced into this union. No one cared as to what I want or desired. My head ached, my heart constricted and my eyes brimmed with tears, I frantically blinked several times. But the stubborn tears trickled down my cheeks. I wanted to hide the tears from everyone around me. I wanted to be left alone.

I was sitting with my arms spread as Amal and Manal meticulously applied oriental henna designs on the hands. I had my knees drawn up awaiting for my feet henna to dry. I laid my forehead on my knees desperate to conceal my emotional outpour. A sob escaped my lips.

"Ramlah?" Manal stopped applying the henna and cautiously touched my shoulder.

"hmm.." I didn't bother to lift my head.

"Are you okay?" she whispered.

Sighing I turned my head towards her still resting on my knees, "ya, just a little tired."

She narrowed her eyes and continued to stare at me as if trying to gauge what I was thinking. She moved a little closer to me, "is something bothering you?"

Her eyes were boring down mine. I tried to speak to reassure her but nothing came out. Instead, tears were flowing now. I was weeping. Abruptly, Amal halted applying henna as well. She started rubbing my back to calm me. But the tears would continue.

Sana had just walked into the room when she saw the emotional scenario. She tapped on Amal's shoulder and scooted near me.

"Girls, let me speak to her. Give us some privacy." Sana instructed.

Nodding my friends and sisters moved out of the room.

Cupping my face in her hands and wiping the tears from my cheeks with her thumbs, she asked softly, "What's the matter Ramlah?"

"I....I..." my lips quivered and more tears trickled down my cheeks.

She hugged me and in that moment I felt someone would understand. She was married she would know what I was going through. I just knew I had made a new close friend.

"I am scared" I whispered resting my head on her shoulder.

"It's natural for a bride to be nervous," she replied while soothingly rubbing my back.

"I don't know Fahd gives me some negative vibes." I murmured.

She stilled in her act of calming me. "it will be ok. Fahd is..." she cleared her throat and continued, "Inshaa Allah it will be ok. His family is really good. Saad always tells me. And we will be neighbours. I will always be there for you if you need any help."

I pushed myself from her arms and smiled ruefully, "Thank you that means so much to me knowing someone caring is close by."

She smiled back and squeezed my arm tenderly, "Come on, no more outbursts. You will worry everyone. Cheer up inshaa Allah you will be happy."