lovely boy ; phan [ completed ]

t r e s

dan howell was so very grateful for phil lester; and that was so very bad. he loved being with phil - hanging around with him, listening to him talk, discretely taking notes for the project and sketching him when he wasn't paying attention. that would be good for most people, but not for dan. he knew he'd eventually leave, having to break off contact with most people he'd leave behind. he knew he'd have to leave phil, and it'd only been a day, but he couldn't bare the thought of it.

he layed in his bed that night, finishing the sketch off with the pencils phil had bought him. phil was the only person other than his family that had ever gotten him a gift - he figured that's why he had reacted the way he did. he didn't know what had come over him when he hugged phil, but phil didn't pull away, much to his surprise. he wasn't sure what phil saw in him, but he was happy he saw something.

phil drove dan home, and walked him to his door. "ph-phil, you don't h-have to walk me to the door," dan insisted, but phil shook his head. "don't worry about dan, i want to. plus, i'm already out of the car, so i might as well continue on," phil giggled. dan smiled and blushed, and the boys walked to the door. "ph-phil?"

"yeah, dan?"

"thank you. so much."

"what for?"

"for being a really great friend."

both boys smiled, and said their goodbyes. dan watched phil drive away, leaning against the door. he surely felt something for that boy; he just didn't know what.

/|\

the next morning, dan was excited for english, much to his surprise. he practically skipped to class, happy again to be in phil's midst. some part of his brain scolded him for thinking so much about the blue-eyed boy. he slipped into his seat, and phil sat down minutes later. "hey," phil said, smiling brightly. "hi," dan blushed and looked away. "i had fun yesterday," phil whispered in dan's ear, turning to face front as soon as he had finished saying it. dan swore the kid knew what he was doing to him, and just liked watching him squirm.

"alright," mr. yarrow began, "today we're just going to continue on your project, and that's what we'll do the rest of the week, as it's due a week from today. some of you may have gotten a start already, which is great," dan snuck a sideways glace at phil. "so everyday when you come in, just start working." mr. yarrow continued. "everyone good?" a chorus of yes's came back in response, and mr. yarrow nodded. "get to it!" he said, sitting at his desk. 

dan and phil turned towards each other, almost simultaneously. "h-hi again," dan whispered. "hey again," phil whispered back. "why are we w-whispering?" dan said, still keeping his voice low. "because sometimes, in a world of noise, it's good to be the quiet," phil replied quietly. he locked eye contact with dan, and they smiled at each other. they talked about anything and everything, dan occasionally pretending to write something while he was actually working on a new sketch of phil. before they knew it, the period was over.

phil leaned close to dan and whispered, "i'll see you at lunch." dan blushed profusely, and nodded. he didn't think he'd ever so hastily awaited a lunch period.

/|\

dan could've swore he had never experienced such a long day. he now loathed  the fact that he had the last lunch period. he hurried down the hall, quickly spinning his combination lock. he shoved his things in his locker, grabbing his sketch book and his lunch. he couldn't get to the lunch room fast enough.

dan sat at the table he sat at yesterday, watching the doors. when phil burst through them, he sucked in a quick breath. he could feel the now familiar warmth spread through him as he watched phil from across the room. he tried not to notice the way he smiled and waved to a curly haired boy, sitting with a blonde girl with pink-dyed tips. he tried not to notice his quickened pace when he saw dan. he tried not to notice the shape his mouth formed when he said, "i'll be right back, i've got to get my lunch," while he tried not to notice the way his fingers curled and uncurled around his book as he set it down on the table. dan tried not to notice that phil placed his books next to him instead of across from him. he tried not to notice how phil's smile brightened when he walked back to the table, just like he tried not to notice how close phil sat next to him. he tried not notice that he was more than okay with phil sitting this close to him. he tried not to notice, but he did. he was an artist, and phil was his muse - he could try as hard as he wanted to not  to notice certain things, but he ultimately would notice them.

dan seemed to be on another planet, and phil just kept talking, and dan was okay with that. he was spaced out, studying phil's every feature and pledging it to memory. he was shaken out of his thoughts by phil's concerned voice. "dan are you alright? you seem a bit out there today," he looked at dan with his piercing blue eyes, making dan want to confess his every thought. he didn't though, instead answering, "don't worry about it, i'm good," adding a small smile. he couldn't help thinking that he was beyond good, he was fantastic, he was wonderful. he was near phil, and phil made him happier than he'd ever been, but he didn't say that. he just listened to phil talk about his horrid math teacher.

soon enough, lunch was over with, and the two were heading to art. phil walked almost suffocatingly close. dan's breaths grew shorter, and he prayed phil wouldn't notice. unfortunately, just dan's luck, he did notice, and worry clouded his bright eyes. "dan, are you alright?" he asked, putting his hand on dan's shoulder, making it even more difficult to breathe. "i'm f-fine," he insisted, still slightly hyperventilating. "if you say so," phil said, skeptically raising an eyebrow. dan smiled weakly in an attempt to ensure how fine he truly was.

in art, dan was giddy to start on the project posted on the board. the directions stated 'draw the person you share a table with' and dan was sharing a table with phil. "dan, do you need me to pose or anything?" phil asked. dan shook his head. "just b-be natural," he instructed, once again cursing his stutter. he couldn't tell if phil complied, because he didn't have to look up much. he finished the sketch quickly, as he just finished the sketch he had been working on earlier. "alright phil, i'm finished. do you want me to pose?" he asked, looking up from his paper. "i'm already finished," phil said, holding up his sketch book for dan to see. the sketch was of dan, leaned over his sketch pad, a pencil in his hand. his eyebrows were knit together, and he was biting his lip. "you just looked so focused, and i figured i should draw you when you were effortlessly posing as a work of art," phil explained, his face catching a pink tint. dan giggled quietly. 

"can i see your sketch?" phil asked. dan hesitated. he'd never shown anyone his drawings before. he figured his logical parents wouldn't appreciate his love of art, and no one had become close enough to him to make him want to show them his sketches. "s-sure," dan said, placing his sketch book open in front of phil. he watched phil's eyes scan the page, his grin growing with every inch of paper he scanned.

"dan, this.. this is beautiful," phil said, eyes filled with wonder and amazement. dan blushed. "i wouldn't say the drawing is what makes it beautiful, i'd say it was the subject of it," he said, and it was phil's turn to blush. the two grinned at each other. "has anyone told you how truly amazing you are, though? this looks like a photograph," phil gushed. dan shook his head. "no one's ever really seen my drawings," he said. phil stared at him in disbelief. "you should show the world!" he exclaimed. "i already have," dan replied, and phil's face flushed. the two boys spent the rest of the period quietly chatting in the loud room, once again being the quiet in the noise.

< a/n >

word count ; 1451

hellooo everyone! i'm so happy i could update early, which means i'll probably update crayon head early too, for any of you who are reading that.

so yesss, i have a band concert in half an hour, wish me luck!! -sam