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I fell asleep with a heavy feeling in my chest, but I woke up with an absolutely crushing feeling burning in my lungs. I was screaming and thrashing and I couldn't exactly figure out why. I was sweating; my hair stuck to my forehead and neck and my throat was aching.

I must've screamed for hours, or at least, that how it felt. Suddenly, my own arms weren't the only ones wrapped around my body. Lips tickled my ear, but I couldn't tell what words were escaping them. Everything was a blur - a red, hazy blur and all I could hear was my hoarse screaming.

I wanted to die. I wanted to fucking die right then and right there, because I couldn't take it anymore.

"What's going on? Frank - hey, Frank, can you hear me?"

I nodded, the cry catching in my throat. Why was Gerard the one wrapped around me and not my own mother? Where was she? Couldn't she hear my voice?

"What happened?" He repeated, his hand caressing the back of my neck and pulling me closer to him. I buried my face in his shoulder, my breath hitching occasionally.

I hated the night terrors. I thought they'd went away; I hadn't woke up in a cold sweat like that in over seven years. I swallowed hard. I knew it wasn't real. They were never real; just dreams, nothing more.

"I - it's alright," I choked out. "Night terrors."

Gerard held me tight, and I wondered why he was doing this. For one, it was three in the morning and all the doors should be locked. I didn't know how the hell Gerard even knew I was awake, let alone how he kept getting into my house. Plus, I thought he was done with me.

"I'm messing up your shirt," I murmured into his chest. He only patted my back soothingly and said, "I've got other shirts, you know."

He sat with me, in my bed, holding me against his body, until my breathing evened out.

Maybe I'd never understand Gerard. Maybe I wasn't meant to.

hi this one is short and i do not know what i am doing !! ha nice @ self

lmao does this seem like it's going in circles bc it does to me and i !! promise !! im !! working !! on !! the !! pLOT !!

thank u guys and i love you all

coffee
reblog if u agree

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