unsteady // g.d. // completed

twenty four.

It's quite hazy how I even ended up in Denise's backyard, yet here I was with Ross, offering me a cigarette to calm down.
"I have to find Gia," I sigh, running a hand through my hair.
"She left."
"When did she leave?"
"You don't remember anything, do you?"
I blankly stare at him as he sighs.
"I'm sure you remember everything up until the point where Matty called our girls home wreckers, cause you almost killed the little shit."
"Fuck sake," I murmur. The last time I blacked out from being so angry was in grade 9, or maybe sometime in the past year when I was drunk enough, who knows.
"Adam and I had to pull you off him, but if you didn't do something, I would've."
"Why am I talking to you? I like you just as much as I like Matty right now."
Ross shrugs, "Same goes for you I guess."
"Where's Gia?"
"Somewhere with Adam."
He offers me a cigarette which I take this time.
"And your girl?"
"Upstairs."
I give a short nod before turning around and walking back inside. I ignore my mum as she know came out from the dining area, scolding me as I walked past and straight out the front door, slamming the door shut behind me. The front yard has no sign of anyone, but I make my way to the side of the house where I hear idle chatter.
"Hey," I smile softly as I sit on the grass next to Gia who has her knees pulled close to her chest.
"Hey," she whispers back weakly.
Adam gives me a certain look from where he sits on the other side of her that I nod to, in which he excuses himself before disappearing into the other side of the bushes.
"Sorry that all of this happened," I apologize as I wrap an arm around her then thumb at her tears with my free hand.
"It's my fault," she sniffles.
"No it's not. Don't listen to that asshole."
"He's your best friend, though."
"Doesn't mean I can't agree with him."
She sniffles again as I plant a kiss on her cheek.
"Why can't we have a normal relationship?"
"That's a good question," I snort, which makes her giggle.
"Can we go home now?"
"Course babe."
The next hour there isn't much talking, only static silence. From the car ride home, to after Gia has gotten out of the shower to wash the red wine smell off herself and soundly sleeping in bed with the duvet pulled close to her chest. I know how fragile she is, which isn't her fault, and I feel terribly bad for her because she's surrounded by insensitive cunts like I, who know of her state yet choose to continue to be an insensitive cunt. Here I was at 9pm, on my way to see my ex for god knows why while my girlfriend slept in my bed unaware I was even gone.
"Thanks for ditching, asshole."
"Nice to see you too," I smirk only to get on her nerves, which works.
"Ironic isn't it? How I'm the asshole now?"
"Oh, fuck off," the curly haired brunette sighs, harshly shutting the door of her flat behind me. We used to have banters like this all the time and if I'm being quite honest, I missed it. I missed her.
"Gladly, babe."
After about a fifteen minutes of useless small talk over a glass of wine, we decide to go out for a walk for no real reason. The harsh cold Manchester air hits my face as we walk down the sidewalk illuminated by the yellow street lamps and shops nearby.
"Do you miss it? How things used to be?"
We stop walking, mostly because the winds blowing a bit harder now, and we turn to the direction it's blowing to shield ourselves. Half of her tan face reflects the light from a street lamp ahead and I can't help but take her in as I'm shoving my hands deep into my jacket pockets.
"Of course," I mumble, my voice coming out a little more hoarse than intended.
Her face shows a flicker of sadness before she speaks up again,
"Remember that time we convinced Matty he'd been high for two days?" she giggles.
"Yeah, he was wrecked," I snort, remembering how Olivia and I laughed so hard we were crying and struggling to breathe while Matty freaked.
"Does your girlfriend get high?" Her tone softens along with her face.
"Sometimes," I shrug, wishing we could reminisce some more instead of bringing things to the present. I also kinda wished I didn't tell her I had a girlfriend earlier.
"We used to get high everyday," she smiles up at me and it's almost a smirk. I nod, grinning back.
"Admit it, G," she bites her lip.
"Admit what?"
"You still love me."
"Olivia...," I trail off, feeling my chest tighten.
"Do you love her? Your girlfriend?"
"Come on-"
"Answer me, George," she raises her voice while I feel as if I'd pass out at any second. Olivia grabs the sleeves of my jacket to pull me closer, searching my facial expressions as tears build up over her light brown eyes that I could never stop telling her about how beautiful they were.
"No. I don't love her."

The door in front of him seems to be swaying back and forth, and once his fist comes in contact with it, his whole body falls forward. It holds him upright...until it's opened.
"Fucks sake, what the hell is wrong with you."
"Matthew, I'm f-fucked."
He opened his eyes for the first time in what felt like hours.
"Cheew," Matty drags out then demonstrates to George how to do so by the sound of his teeth clicking together.
"Fuck," George groans through a mouthful of food he knows for a fact he didn't agree to have put in his mouth before actually chewing.
"That's it. Bread is good. Bread sobers you up, mate."
George bursts into laughter until a piece of bread flies out of his mouth.
"Oh man," he slurs, attempting to grab it but his hand doesn't match up with his line of vision.
"George, what the hell happened to you," Matty chuckles, now sitting beside his best friend on the carpeted floor he was sure he hadn't even realized he was sitting on. If it weren't for his state, Matty wouldn't be talking to George at the moment from today's fiasco.
"It all started when I was five..."
"G, stop," Matty tries to contain his laughter, "Tell me how and why you got so shit-faced."
"All I remember is," George pauses to hiccup, "she gave me lots of wine and lots of um, sex. Yeah, sex, but with only kissing."
"And Gia let you leave this fucked up after?" Matty raises an eyebrow.
"Gia?" George scrunches his nose, "No, Olivia."
***
[IM SORRY BUT I HAD TO END IT THERE DONT HATE ME]