Cruel and Blue | Crack

46. Ice Cream

Ben : *happily goes to fridge and takes ice cream from the freezer* *opens it* *sees that it's almost completely empty* *smile drops* *yells* WHAT THE FUCK, SOMEBODY ATE HALF MY ICE CREAM! JEFF!! JACK!!

Jack : *runs in* WHAT HAPPENED.

Jeff : *runs in and glances at jack*

Ben : *angry voice* one of y'all ate my ice cream!

Jeff : *gets mad* What's up?

Jack : *glances at jeff*

Jeff : *hella mad voice* How do you know I ate it!

Ben : I NEVER SAID YOU ATE IT, I SAID ONE OF YALL ATE IT!

Jeff : *dumbfounded look on his face*

Jack : YOU NEED TO CALM DOWN! I'm sure there's an explanation for all this.

Ben : I AIN'T CALMING DOWN, THIS IS THE THIRD TIME IT HAPPENED!

Jack : I CANT BELIEVE YOU FLIPPING OUT OVER ICE CREAM! ILL BUY YOU ANOTHER ICE CREEEAM!!

Ben : I DONT CARE ABOUT THE ICE CREAM! *almost out of breath* I CARE ABOUT THE PRINCIPAL!!!!

Jeff : biTCH FUCK YO PRINCIPAL! I WANT AN APOLOGY!

Ben :*high pitched voice* FOR WHAT!

Jeff : *mimics him in the same voice making a hella angry face* FOR WHAT? FOR ACCUSING *points to himself* ME!

Ben : MAN FUCK YO APOLOGY! ONE OF YALL BETTA FESS UP! *pauses* *serious tone* or we ain't friends anymore.

Jeff : *fake sad voice* Oh my god we're not friends- FUCK YOUR FRIENDSHIP THEN!

Jack : nnoOOOOOO! I DONT LIKE IT! I DONT BELIEVE THIS SHIT! WE'RE GOING TO END OUT FRIENDSHIP OVER ICE CREAM!

Ben : ONE OF YALL BETTA TELL ME WHAT I WANNA HERE! *grabs phone out of pocket* or I'm calling the cops

Jack : you'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!

Ben : NO! ONE OF YALLS A BURGLAR!

Jack : PUT THE PHONE DOOWN!

Jeff : look it herE YOU PUNK BITCH! CALL THE COPS THEN CAUSE I AINT GOING SAY SHIT!

Ben : IM CALLING *dials 911* *holds phone to ear*

Dispatcher : 911 emergency

Ben : THIS IS AN EMERGENCY! ONE OF MY ROOMMATES IS A BURGLAR!

Dispatcher : what did they steal?

Ben : MY ICE CREAM

Dispatcher : ice cream?

Ben : YES!

Dispatcher : *hangs up*

Ben : *dumbfounded* *yells into the phone* FUCK THE POLICE! AGHH! *puts phone into the freezer*

All of them : *silent*

Ben : OH WE GOING TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT! *picks up a knife all of a sudden*

Jeff : OH! *grabs knife* YOU WANNA GET GANGSTA IN THIS MOTHERFUCKER CUZ! We can do this shit- crypts all day.

Jack : PUT THE KNIVES DOWN ITS JUST FUCKING ICe cream.

Ao : *walks in* OH MY GOD! WHAT ARE YOU GUYS DOING!

Ben : *grabs ao's head and slams it on the counter, aims knife at her head* WHO ATE MY ICE CREAM!

Ao : OH MY GOD, *screams* YOURE CRAZY!!

Ben : I CANT TRUST ANYBODY

Jack : WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THAT MY FUCKING GIRLFRIEND!

Ben : I CANT TRUST ANYTHING YOU SAY JACK!

Jack : WHHAAAT?

Jeff : MAN FUCK YO GIRLFRIEND! I HATE HER SHAVED ASS FUCKING LOP SIDED TITTY BITCH! I DON'T CARE! I ain't going to say shIIT!

Ao : WHAT! FUCK YOU, YOU GORILLA!!

Jack : FUCK THE BOTH OF YOU! YOU AND BEN HAVE LOP SIDED TITTIES!! CALM THE FUCK DOWN!!

Ben : FUCK EVERYBODY WHO ATE MY COOKIES AND CREAM ICE CREAM!

Jack : cookies and cream? COOKIES AND FUCKING CREAM?! I CANT BELIEVE YOU JUSTSAIDCOOKIESANDCREAM! CANT YOU SEE- OH MY GOD! OH MY FUCKING GOD LOOK AT YOUR- ASHKLSSJKAKA! WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOURE FUCKING EYEBALLS IT SAYS VANILAAAaaa!!

Ben : *checks the ice cream* *smiles innocently at them, even though he knows he's going to get his ass beat* *laughs awkwardly* My-my bad. *continues to laugh awkwardly*

Ao : *grabs knife*

Sam : *grabs a shit ton of knives*

Jeff : *grabs his knife*

Jack : *grabs bananas*

Ben : M-my bad *opens freezer, hides behind the small door*

• • •

bruh I was trying so hard not to laugh while doing this and I failed miserably

this is based on a jkfilms skit called "Ice Cream" and watching it is actually more fucking hilarious than just reading it on here (it's in the multimedia)

I also changed up some wording so that some lines can fit the c&b characters

so yea

this chapter is really long

hopefully it makes up for all the really short and not really that funny updates c: