whoever once wrote, "Silence is deafening" must have known how Joshua was feeling, and how he feels about this.
He glances at his room mate, for the thousandth time, wondering what time it was exactly, what on earth is going on in Soonyoung's mind?
Is he having a war in his head, too?
"Joshua," the voice of the younger breaks the silence, "does anyone else know about this?"
Joshua doesn't realise that he was holding his breath in this entire time ; he mid-exhales.
"no."
Soonyoung furrowed his eyebrows, and unfolds and folds his hands.
"You won't tell anyone, would you?" The worried voice of the soft-spoken man interrupts his train of thought.
"Why did you choose to tell me? If you so desperately do not want anyone to know?"
"I was getting tired. Tired of having to deal with all of this alone."
Right now, Joshua feels small, like all of his secrets were exposed. Once upon a time, he felt like a white chair in a white room filled with tens and thousands of coloured chairs. Red, blue, green, yellow, orange.
you name it.
now, he's the only red chair in a pure white room, with all the white chairs staring at him.
who knew it could be so, uncomfortable..? Joshua didn't, that's for sure.
His heart was in his throat, and he was certain it could leap out at any moment and he would be thankful.
"Is there a way to get rid of the hanahaki disease?" the curiousity in his voice was evident.
"well, yes."
"tell me more."
and so he starts explaining the whole surgical process and such to Soonyoung. The latter listens while nodding his head intently as if to absorb information.
"so let me get this straight, by removing the flowers, it ultimately removes your feelings for whoever too?"
"yes, any romatic emotions would just be gone. The surgery is a safe process and that's not the reason as to why I do not want to get mine removed."
"Why then? Tell me the reason why."
"You see, Hoshi," he glances at his friend, "love, it's so terribly hard to experience and find and well, I'm just afraid I'll lose this feeling."
Somewhere else, a thunderstorm was approaching.
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A/N: hello hello! how have y'all been? things good?
I wrote this on a sick day, so pardon any grammatical errors (/.\)
HOHOHO how's the chapter though! (/ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)/
YOU ARE READING
Hanahaki • Jihan
Fanfiction'so this is what you get for loving' a story that follows Joshua Hong as he falls in love with a certain bandmate of his. Will the pain drive him away? Or is it all worth it in the end?
