Chapter 9

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Janie's POV

My bed had become a haven to me for the past few hours. Caroline had repeatedly tried to come in and talk to me about what she just saw, but I couldn't bring myself to open the door. For the fourth time now, I heard her feet padding away, her sighs following as well. I turned myself into the blankets, comforted by the heat that I was surrounded with. The only thing holding me back from turning the door handle, was my guilt. Lying had always been my least favorite thing, and I kept so many secrets from my closest friend. I had never done such a thing, this was all new territory.

Speaking of new territory, Brendan was something else. When his lips met mine, it felt as if I was on cloud nine. The way the soft pink pillows melded into mine made me weak in the knees. His hands roaming across my skin, dancing sparks filled my body, making me feel alive. I wanted nothing more than to do it again, but every time I thought about kissing my mate, I was filled with the memories of other men from my old pack touching me, filling me with dread. Their grimy, meaty fingers felt nothing like the way I felt with him. Their slimy tongues made me shiver. During those times in that black basement, I was at my lowest, knowing no one was coming to save me, and I would forever be alone. Back in the depths of my mind, I think I thought that I deserved it. These lustful men were my karma for doing that terrible thing so long ago.

What I did was a devastation to everyone, including me. When I was little, that one thought took over my mind 24/7, and it was all I could think about. Things that shouldn't of happened to an eight year old happened to me. I was too little to realize back then I was the bubble gum on their shoe, something everyone wanted to get rid. Tumbling around, I finally curled into a position that I deemed comfortable. Drifting off I felt a presence next to me, and I almost screamed when I saw who was watching me intently.

Those same eyes were searching my soul, and I instantly tried to flee the bed, only to be caught in the covers, and fall to the ground. Or, so I thought. Before I could slam on the ground, I was caught in the arms of my mate, feeling the flow of electricity go through me. How did this man even get in? I hadn't even heard the door, and he somehow made it to the bed without me seeing. I flinched away, wanting nothing more than to have my personal space back. Something flickered across Brendan's eyes, before his face became stoic. He pushed himself away, scooting to the far edge of the bed. His head was held down, but through his lashes, I could see a hint of determination laced in his features. Was that directed towards me?

I twiddled with my hands, desperate for him to break the silence between us. We were supposed to be so relaxed and easy around each other. I should have known nothing would ever be easy for me. I stifled back a cough as he shifted his weight and stretched his legs across the frame, almost touching me. I noticed that he had light blue socks on, one of my favorite colors. With that, I smiled. Brendan must have noticed, because he gave off a small chuckle, his own smile playing across his lips. His laugh was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard, and I found my cheeks widening at the thought of it.

I watched intently as his hands made his way towards me, regarding me as if I was some wounded animal. Heck, in his eyes, I probably was. My mind was screaming at me to pull away and get the heck out of this house, but something deeper inside me told me to stay. I needed him, more than I think anyone would ever know. His hands finally clasped mine, and I felt my heart breaking a little, but at the same time, I couldn't help but acknowledge the joy that was coursing through my body. I wondered if he felt all of the emotions that were going through me right now. Honestly, I was new to this mate thing. I was never given a proper sit down and told how you would one day meet the man or woman that had the power to make your heart stop and have your whole world turn upside down in seconds.

Finally, his musical voice filled the air, and my eyes widened substantially when he spoke, " you have no idea what I feel for you, my sweet little mate, I will cherish you forever." I gulped and nodded, no words forming. I wanted to say something to go along with that sentence, try and justify my feelings to him, but I was struggling to breathe, let alone form a sentence. Brendan must have sensed my tensing, as he wrapped me in his strong arms once again, rubbing circles around my back. I sighed in content, air finally entering my lungs. I wanted to stay in this man's embrace for eternity, but I knew I had to get out before I got too attached to him. I still knew that I had to get as far away from him as possible, I was a ticking time bomb when I was around my mate. One day I would blow up and leave him destroyed.

Shaking my head slightly, I scurried to the door of the room, wishing to leave as soon as possible. I turned the cool metal, opening the door a crack before it was abruptly shut by a hand above me. I had a sliver of hope that Caroline would come to save me but to no prevail, here I was. I could sense his presence behind my back, his hot breath fanning on my neck. I shivered involuntary, but tried again. I had to leave, couldn't he see that? I just need a breath of fresh air, that wasn't tainted by his intoxicating scent. The same hand kept the door closed, and as he locked it, my fate was sealed along with it.

"As I said before, my beautiful little flower, you can't run away from me, I just won't have it, not at all." My fists scrunched up, not knowing what was next.

"Now my darling, now that I finally have you, I have quite a few questions."

Tick, tick.

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