kiwi | kim taehyung

[33] new messages!

"i'm going to ask one more time. what weighs more: a kilogram of steel," she paused, seeming especially irritated with me this time, "or a kilogram of feathers?"

"i.. i don't get it."

"okay, look. the question asks if the work done in a series circuit with 300 volts and a current of 45 amps after five seconds, is greater than that of one in a combination circuit with a potential difference of 90 volts and 150 amps over the same time period."

i groaned, pulling the skin of my face down in my frustration, "i can read the fucking question, i just ..."

"what aren't you understanding then, areum?" chaejin laughed. i only shook my head, my brows coming close together as i gave her my usual, perplexed reply,

"i don't get it."

she chuckled. the smile on her face was worn and sarcastic, and i knew i was upsetting her.

hitting a fist to her forehead three times, she recomposed herself while i tried to separate my knitted brows. slowly but surely, i was making her regret inviting me over to do homework.

"okay," chaejin sighed, "alright, so we know work in a circuit is equal to voltage times current times time, right?"

"v-squared-t over big R—"

"no, you can only use that if they give you resistance."

"they gave us resistivity."

then i pointed to the problem, trying to make sense of it all. but the shaking of her head proved that there was just no limit on how fucking wrong i could get.

"no, but that's rho. we need resistance to use that formula."

"work equals i-squared-R-t—"

"let's just use the VIT formula though, okay?"

"o-okay.." i agreed. didn't understand a word of it but i nodded anyway, "alright, i see what you're saying now."

no the fuck i didn't.

"okay so which one do you think does more work?"

"the series circuit. because it has like, a-a bigger voltage."

"well what weighs more? a kilogram of steel, or a kilogram of feathers?"

"the steel."

"no, they're both the same. just like three hundred times forty five is 13,500," she groaned,"and so is ninety times one hundred fifty.""

"but," i looked at the problem before me, countless numbers and terms that should have made sense but looked just like fucking urdu to me,

"steel is heavier than feathers."

"areum, you can't—" chaejin slapped a hand to her forehead, "they're both a kilogram!"

"that's cheating, it would take like a billion feathers to balance a small amount of steel though."

"that's not cheating, that's just how shit works."

my eyes wouldn't leave the problem.

stupid fucking problem. i wouldn't have to do this problem if it wasn't for kang, that useless evil shit. why would he assign this? it's so hard.

i heard somewhere that isaac newton was born a farmer boy who couldn't go to school until he saved the life of some rich guy from a runaway horse cart. that rich guy was so moved, he paid young isaac's way through school.

where he discovered physics.

i, looking at the word problem before me, found myself cursing that rich guy, and his father, and his father's father, for making him so unathletic. because if only that bitch knew how to dodge a horse cart, isaac would have stayed in his fucking lane, grew some corn and wheat and shit, and died without discovering physics.

and if physics wasn't discovered, i wouldn't be in kang's class, i wouldn't be flunking kang's class, and i most definitely would not be spending fifteen minutes on a word problem that won't even help me learn how to file my tax reports.

since i'd been staring at the worksheet so long, you should probably make that fifteen minutes and twenty seconds. i would have shot for fifteen and twenty one, but chaejin cut in again with her wise words that make everything so clear all of a sudden.

"what aren't you—"

she tried to rest a hand on my shoulder, but i quickly brushed her off. i still had my eyes on the problem, hoping it would make some kind of sense if i stared hard enough, but alas. i was wrong.

"no, don't—" i whispered, shaking my head again. "i don't get it."

"areum y—"

"i don't get it."

she shut the binder and reclined on her bed against the frame, reaching for her phone, "i think it's time for a break."

my head fell into my hands.

"work equals v-squared-t over big R ..."

"you're gonna do great on the next test." chaejin snorted, poking me with her foot. i sat cross-legged all along, but so suddenly i threw myself across her mattress and screamed my frustrations out.

"yo, cut that yelling shit out!" chaejin snapped, cutting my scream therapy short, "i have a headache. don't do that."

i gave her a scowl, so she rolled her eyes and returned to whatever she was doing on her phone.

"areum, don't fucking yell!"

- chaejin, while yelling.

what a hypocrite.

i traced the swirling patterns of chaejin's yellow and grey bedding for a while, and let my feet dangle off the sides. it was now too quiet for my liking, and with my face buried into the teddy bear beneath my head, i suddenly got another idea.

scream therapy part two.

"areum!" chaejin smacked my calf. i stopped abruptly and turned back to her.

"um, ow??" i said, "i didn't even yell, you brick-for-hands ass bi—"

"it's not the yelling, shut up."

she paused, looking back at her phone with wide and elated eyes.

"do you still like taehyung?"

"still? bitch i never did!" i rolled onto my side with what i imagine to be a nasty look on my face, "and that's my final answer. lock it in, hoe."

"what about now?"

and as i read the screenshot from hoseok, everything from white day, to what taehyung had in mind for me, and him asking for help with shopping, i swore i felt my heart drop.

in a good way. so i guess my heart lifted? i don't know.

but i do know i don't know how to channel my emotions well. so what should have been a simple, "yes, i was lying, and i do have a crush on him," came out sounding a little like,

"well i mean like maybe i do like him i guess a lot of bit many much sometimes."

+

please watch the attached video which, might i add, was the inspiration for this chapter and my mood every time i walk into my physics class.