Double life

Chapter 34

Chapter 34

Skylar POV

The first thing that caught my attention when I opened my eyes was that I was extremely comfortable and warm. Which was pretty odd because hospital chairs are extremely bad for my poor but. But I wasn't sitting on a hard hospital chair, I was sitting on two soft legs connected to a guy I spent the most beautiful kiss with in my life... And my only one. When I looked more closely I could clearly see the details on his face that are normally masked by the fuss around you. The way his nose wasn't completely straight but slightly off, and his incredibly long lashes. His perfect porcelain skin that seemed like it was glowing while his body recovered all the emotions and events from the day before by sleeping. His mouth hung slightly open and his hair fell in front of his eyes. His head rested on my shoulder and made my whole body heat up.

I pushed his soft brown hair back with the tip of my fingers, but sadly, I pulled him from his mesmerizing sleep.

' Morning.' He said to me while opening his eyes and lifting his head up. It was at that moment that he and I simultaneously noticed that I woke him up and that I was a creeper. I was frozen in place, on top of his lap and with my cheeks rapidly turning into the color of a tomato.

' I swear I wasn't being creepy.' I pushed out involuntarily. I let my hands fall onto my face in embarrassment.Of course I must be the one to be weird.

' I'm sorry to interrupt you guys but we caught a change in Derek's brain activity.' The doctor I didn't hear come in said. He looked decent but I didn't know he was treating my brother. Up until now we only got information of nurses but we never actually met the doctor.

' So, what's with that ? ' He may say that, but I actually have no idea what that means. I only know how to nurse fight wounds.

' Well as he is in a coma that first things that tell us something is happening is his brain activity. We've been monitoring specific parts of his brain and about ten minutes ago we found some changes. The only bad news is that we can't say if it's positive or negative.'

I really don't know what to think. I don't even want to think about what would happen if it was negative. I can't bare to lose him again.

' What's going to happen now ? ' I started to panic immediately. But surprisingly, for the first time in my life, someone was there. Connor held me and he gave small squeezes in my sides to let me know that he was there for me. A foreign feeling filled me aside from the burning sensation I had been feeling since yesterday. He didn't say anything, and he didn't have to. His touches alone soothed me enough to calm me down. How things can change in only a day ... How feelings can come to the surface and ^how situations can evolve .... It's just crazy if you think about it.

' I know this will be annoying but I would like to do some tests with me and my team, can we kindly ask you to leave this room ? You can enjoy a meal in our restaurant or you can wait in the waiting room. ' I actually didn't want to leave Derek. I have the feeling that he is going to wake up any minute now ... I hope he will.

' Do you want to eat something ...? I'll buy.' Connor said while lifting me up from his lap. The great sensation threatened to die down when his body wasn't touching mine anymore to i took his hand. He looked me straight in the eyes, almost surprised by my action.

' Do you mind ?' I asked him, 'I can't be alone right now.' I really don't know where this weakness is coming from. But i just can't be bothered with hiding myself from him. It feels like I'm just punishing myself by doing that. I just want to hug him and forget the world. I've said it a thousand times but, why did I ever push him away. Why would I ever push my feelings away. The more I actually think about it, the more I realize that I am one of the stupidest people on earth. All my life since the accident I've been hiding myself and pushing everyone away that could ever care about me. Why would anyone push themselves through that pain? I don't even understand myself anymore. I was blinded by the loss of my brother and the honor I would give him by following in his footsteps. And I really wanted to be just like him, all my life. He used to be my roll-model, for everything. I wanted to become just as cool as him, as tough and smart. He's one of the most complex guys I know, or knew.

I'm scared that everything changed. I know that nothing will be the same but I just really hope that he will recover , that his personality will still be intact. I hope my brother isn't lost.... But I do have a good feeling about it. When we were in Riley's cellar we talked. Not just small talk, but conversations about the accident, about what happened to him. About how I managed to get through life without dying. But despite the misery he was in and the misery I had just been brought into, he could still laugh.

I still remember the moments where he would just look at me. I would ask what his problem was and he would just laugh. Laugh and continue to stare at me. After a few times he told me that at those moments he was just thinking about me and how he was extremely proud of what I did and what I had achieved.

' I'm not going anywhere.' Connor said while he put his hand on my lower back. He lead me outside the room Derek was in. Once we sat down with our food I think reality kind of hit me. I could really see how tired Connor looked. A nurse told us the boys were going home for the day but that they told her they were coming back every day. I hadn't eaten, I'd just been with Derek and Connor, locking myself between four walls.

' God Connor, everything's a mess. ' I sighed while sipping from my coke. The sugar actually felt great.

' No, Skylar you can't think that way. You just have to see it as a bump in the road. But the road after all the rough patches, the road will flat out and everything will be okay.' He tried to soothe me by drawing soft little circles on my knees. I was pretty ticklish but at that moment I didn't really care.

' You're right. But still, my life is all upside down .... Positive and negative.' I told him. I loved the fact that my brother was back but school was fucked up and my life as I knew it was over.

' But you can build a new one. The chapter of your life where you were hiding everything is over now. You can start over with the people you like ... '

He's right. Of course he is.... I should just face everything and keep all the good aspects of my life, just change the negative ones. He's a genius.

' You know, you're a genius Connor.' I told him while giving him a squeeze in his hand.

' Miss Callaway -...'

...

A/N

So this was it again for another chapter :)

MY personal goal is to get to 250K read globally. So I really hope I will get there.

Ohter than that i just want to thank every reader, I love it that you read my book with dedication.

Without you, this book wouldn't exist.

Xx- Axellesmet

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