Insecure - Tom Hiddleston Imagines Geared Towards Battling Insecurities

Blind

You would think it would be easier, not to see the people who knew that were judging you. You would think "out of sight, out of mind," so my opinion is really unsanctioned and, well to say frankly, wrong. You would think that because I don't—can't—see faces that I don't know the true motive of the person that fixes their gaze upon me.

But do you need to see a fire to know that it's a danger? Isn't warming your hand on the back of the door, listening to the crackle of the burning wood, smelling the smoke creeping through the cracks, having the ashes crisping against your skin, and/or the alarm sounding in your ear more than enough to know that your house is burning?

Didn't think so.

Because I can still feel the eyes staring at me incessantly. I can still enter a room and feel the chill of disdain brushing against the back of my neck. I can detect the sharp inhale of little ones, the whispers of parents and other adults amongst themselves, the "oh dear" and other sympathies of older ones, as if being blind is such a calamity and a pitiful state of humanity. I can still hear the wheels in people's heads turning, the silence filled with the ticks of the mental cogs as they try to process how to act, what to say, debating to act normal or to test my "inability," like wiping your finger on something with a "Wet Paint" sign.

Because when did being blind mean that I'm any less human? When does being blind mean that I'm automatically deserve to be treated nicer, like some sort of pity, charity case? Why can't I get treated nice simply because?

Maybe that's why makes finding friends and falling in love a bit easier. Because I can weed out before harvesting. I don't have to spend time trying to rationalize and weigh their good looks for their attitude, or how they treat me when I'm not looking, because they think I'm already not seeing. Because I already am. I can see everything so clear, so perfectly crystal clear.

Which made falling for Tom so much simpler. Because it was his invisible qualities that shone through so vividly, his kindness and love and genuineness. He didn't have to hide or pretend to be a nice person because it was already who he was. He didn't have to try to make me feel at home because his smile radiated a warmth that wrapped around me like a blanket. He didn't make my blindness feel crippling; he didn't make it feel like a stumbling block. And he didn't deify it either, making it seem like a superpower. I wasn't an alien or animal on display, nor Superman or Wonder Woman. Tom made me feel part of the human race, made me feel ordinary but so special to him, like your favorite book some people know about, but only you care so passionately about.

And, to me, although it may not seem like much, that will always be enough.

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A/N:

Almost close to 500 followers (omg!) so as a thank you, I'll let you know which imagines are coming up next: motor disease, math, braces, anti-social, stuck-up (I'm guessing that's what "pig-nose" means), virgin/non-virgin, synesthesia (which I have, too, for whoever requested that! xx), and fandoms.

I will be gone from Thursday to Sunday, so trying to write as many updates to all my works as I can until then!