The Mind Games

14

I am so lost.

One of our own died. I retrace the scene in my brain, and track the bullet.

I was next to Kayla and then Chris must've saw something we hadn't, and he dashed in front of me. Oh my God... It didn't hit the tree, and it wouldn't have. The bullet would've hit me. Oh my God. This is all my fault. I'm responsible for Chris' death.

I fall to my knees and stare at my hands in horror. I'm a monster. I killed someone. My breathing becomes seamless, the way it does before you begin to hyperventilate.

"Oh my God. Oh my God," My voice grows louder with each word, "Oh my God. Oh my God."

Maddie sobs into her hands over Chris' body. Cole squats down next to me.

"Andrew," His voice is smooth and calming, "It's not your fault."

Naomi and Kayla stand with their mouths open. Ember stands stuff as a board, tears prick at her eyes. She clenched her fists.

Kayla is the first one of the two to come out of shock first.

"Chris! Chris! No! No, no, no! You can't be dead!" Kayla screams, "He's good at playing tricks! See! Chris you can come out of it now! You got me good!"

Naomi looks down at her yellow shirt, and looks at Chris' body.

"Chris! Please!" Kayla's cry is more than I can handle, pushing me over the edge.

I run to my feel and sprint away from everyone else.

"God," Cole huffs, "ANDREW!"

Cole broke into a run after me.

I sprint, the running I did in the lab carries me well. I dodge trees, not caring to remember where I'm going. I'm a monster. I'm only going to hurt them.

Soon it's just me and my footsteps. I slow, listening for anyone pursuing me. Nothing.

I walk slowly through the trees, and start screaming.

"WHY? WHY CHRIS? WHY NOT ME?! I DESERVE IT!" I scream at no one in particular.

I throw a punch at the nearest tree, which was a mistake, as I felt the pain shoot yo through my knuckles. I extend my fingers, only to find more shooting pain from the tree's revenge.

The splinters in my hand wiggle around as I move my fingers. The pain is extreme, but I don't care.

I hear footsteps in the back of my mind, but I choose to ignore them, as my bloody hand is far most interesting.

"Andrew!" The voice is sharp, and I turn towards it.

"What?" I spit, I glare daggers at the person who approaches, until I see the deep blue shirt.

"What the heck, man? Why'd you just take off?" Cole sticks his hands out to his sides.

"Chris died because of me! I'm a monster!" I yell.

Cole picks up his foot to take a step closer.

"Don't come any closer!" I yell, deciding to snap a branch from a tree near Cole to fall between him and I, and I add on quietly, "I might hurt you too..."

"Andrew! You're not a monster! Why would I come after you then?!" Cole yells back in return to my comment.

"I don't know! How did you find me?!" I spit once more, the rage in my stomachs flaring.

"Andrew," Cole says, his voice calm once more, "Kinda hard to miss the yelling... "

I face-palm, I'm a moron. How could you not miss the yelling?

"Right," I say, my voice dropping as I admit defeat on the subject.

"Please come back with me, Andrew."

"I- I want to... But I can't..." My eyes fall to the ground.

"Why not?"

"I'm a monster..."

Cole releases ab exasperated sigh, "Would you cut that out already? You're not a monster. Kayla needs you, especially now.... And so do I. We all do."

A memory of my little sister slaps me in the face. How could I have even though about leaving her? After all we've gone through? How could I abandon her now..?

"You're right..." I whisper, "You're right."

I walk toward Cole, and the black-haired boy avoid contact with me, but walked near me.

Once we met up with the rest of the group, Ember was facing away and so was Naomi. They were on watch. Pride swells deep within my chest, as I have taught them well.

Kayla and Maddie bend over Chris.

"Cole! You got Andrew back!" Kayla's soft green eyes are blood shot but it didn't take away from her natural beauty.

"Andrew..." Maddie whispers, "What do we do with..." Her eyes shift to the body of the boy in the blood soaked orange shirt.

"Uh...." I hadn't thought about that.

"We can't just leave him," Maddie demands, her voice is firm, and I fully agree with her.

"We can't take him into town with us either," Cole points out, and a stab of pain slices it's way through my soul, "We can't go into town holding a dead nine years old and say, 'This is our friend. He's dead because he got shot. But we didn't shoot him. What do?'."

"Yeah... You're right," I mutter to myself, my hands shake. Survivor's guilt. Mega survivor's guilt.

Naomi turns, taking her eyes of her post, "Wait- did you say, 'What do'?"

Cole looks at her with quite possibly the sassiest face I've ever seen, "Yes. What do 'bout it?"

"Oh... I just wasn't sure... I'm def in one ear, you know?" Naomi turns her back to us, and Maddie sniffles.

"Can we eat it?" Ember says quietly.

"NO!" We all scream in horror at once, mouths gape at her and everyone looks mortified.

"I was just kidding. Kill me for trying to lighten the mood... Jeez," The girl in the real red shirt puts her hands up in defense.

"Don't even joke about that," Kayla says, the pain in her eyes is too much to handle. They've seen it all now. The deeper I look into her light green eyes like mine, the more rage towards that lab I find.

"We have a small shallow grave for him. But then we really need to go," Cole shifts his eyes constantly.

"This is why we keep you around. To keep me in check, and to fix all the problems we didn't even know we had," I chuckle, and when I looked at him, I saw him through a new set of eyes.

A/N: Don't be thinkin' you're gonna get two chapters a day every day. This is a one time deal.

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