STAR BLOSSOM | JUNGKOOK [HIATUS]

「012」

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DEAD LEAVES

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I feel my back pocket once more- it's empty. My medicine case isn't there. Where could I have left it? Why must it be gone when I actually need it? I try to recall the last time I had it. Shit. I left it in my desk during one of my classes. What am I going to do?

I try to leave the dorm to go search for it, but I'm in so much pain right now. I place my hand on my chest and try to keep a steady pace with my breathing. Maybe I need to lay down. I continue to hold onto my chest as I made my way to the bottom of the staircase.

Please don't fall, please don't collapse, never never fall, I really hope I don't fall down the stairs as I'm making my way up. Just as I was about to take a step, my heart shot me onto the floor. Outside the window, over there, the autumn leaves that look like they're at stake. Like those dead leaves there that have fallen and flying. The dead leaves that are becoming shrivelled. I have fallen like those dead leaves that fell. Is this how I'm going to die? But I'm not afraid to. I've already been at a point where I could've died, yet I'm still here. Why must I continue to suffer?

Suddenly I hear a voice in my head, a voice that's soothing me. It's Hanbyul. I must be hallucinating. Inside my memories, I become young again. The only memories I had with Hanbyul was when I was young. Somehow I hold onto these withered memories. I can hear Hanbyul trying to reassure me that the pain is only temporary. Of course it is Hanbyul, this pain can't compare to the pain when I watched you pass away. No pain can beat that. Especially when you, eomma and appa passed away right before my eyes. I always wished for you, eomma and appa to return to me, but now I know it was all just a dream of mine. A dream where I wish I could have you guys back. Every time I hope, your hearts are only going further away, I can't grab you. As if every autumn leaf has fallen, as if everything that seemed eternal is going further away.

I've fallen onto the floor now. If there's such thing as a miracle, it would be me being able to see you guys again. Only the bright memories are dirty, it falls on me. Should I close my eyes to endure the pain?

J U N G K O O K

I'm still holding onto Yoonbyul's medicine case. I should really return it to her. I take out my key card and unlock the door. As I walk in, I notice someone laying on the floor. I gasp.

"YOONBYUL!" I yelled as I ran up to her lifeless body, "Are you alright!?"

I can hear her breathing heavily. I should've found her earlier and given her medicine. Why did I have to let our awkwardness do this? I quickly go get a glass of water and read how many pills I should give Yoonbyul.

"Here Yoonbyul," I said as I helped her with her medicine.

Yoonbyul grew more calm. She had a bit more control with her breathing. 

"Thanks Jungkook. You found my medicine," she smiles.

Although she took her medicine, she looks much more weaker than before. Even in the morning she was much more healthier. I wonder what caused her to feel this much pain. Can it be her transplanted organ? But I don't know which organ she transplanted. I'm very curious. She looks just like a normal person who has never undergone surgery.

I feel Yoonbyul's head. She's having a fever. Did she catch a cold too? It is autumn after all. I carry Yoonbyul and place her onto my bed to rest. She's very light, lighter than Jimin hyung. I could carry her up to her own bed, but I couldn't risk falling down the stairs with her. I am quite clumsy sometimes.