Sink or Swim✓ (Teen Romance)

Chapter Nineteen

A/N: Please read the author's note at the bottom! Thanks and enjoy:)

 

            "You don't get it," I wail for the millionth time.  I am lying in my bed, hunched over and  clutching my stomach.  I think I'm dying.  It feels as though my insides are being scraped raw and lit on fire. 

            "You don't even know what the secret is," says Sarah.  "Maybe it's nothing."

            "If it was nothing, he'd just tell me."  I try to wipe away my tears, but it doesn't do any good.  I've been crying for the last forty minutes, yet the tears continue to fall.  After a moment, I add, "He's obviously seeing her, Sarah."

            "I don't see why you're so upset.  I mean, you've only been together for like a few days."  Sarah crawls into the space beside me, rolling me over until I am forced to look at her. 

            "I know..."  For some reason, I can't bring myself to confess that Elliot and I have been seeing each other for a while now.  I don't want her to get mad at my secrecy; and more than that, I don't want her to realize that this is more important to me than a few-day fling.

            "Beside, what's the worst his secret could be?" 

            At this, I clutch my stomach again.  I imagine Elliot and Cassi together, kissing and doing who-knows what else.  I mean, if I'm honest, I know that Cassi has far more experience than I do.  What if Elliot has been lying to me this entire time, going behind my back and sleeping around with Cassi?  The thought makes my insides squirm—no, it's stronger than that.  My entire body churns and twists with rage and fear at the simple idea.  I choke out another round of tears, only flaring up my pounding headache. 

            "Has he tried to call?" asks Sarah.  She's now awkwardly patting my back, as though that's going to make me feel any better.  She's probably just hoping I'll shut up.

            "I don't know," I mumble.  He tried a few times last night after I went home, but I ignored it every time.  Eventually, I threw my phone into the closest and buried it beneath some old clothes.

            "Let's check."  Sarah pushes from the bed and wanders around my room.  "Umm..."

            "In the closest," I say.  I can almost see her perplexed expression, so I don't bother lifting my head.  Instead, I give more specific directions until I hear her triumphant exclaim of victory when she finds it.

            "Here it is!"  She announces, launching herself back onto my bed. 

            I bury my head into the comforter.  Part of my hopes that he called, but another part hopes he didn't.  Maybe if he just leaves me alone, I'll be able to forget about him sooner.  He can move onto prettier girls, like Cassi, and I can die alone as originally planned. 

            Sarah lets out a low whistle.  "Nine missed calls and eleven new texts.  Seems a bit obsessive for someone who's actually in love with your sister."

            "Can I see?" I ask, my voice muffled by the blanket.  I sound like a pathetic three-year old, but I don't care.

            "Nope," says Sarah, popping the "p".  "Not until you get ready for the swim meet.  We have to be at the school in fifteen minutes."

            "I don't want to go," I whine.  This swim meet is another two-hour drive that I don't want to deal with.  I just want to sit here and cry and mope.  Is that too much to ask for?"