Chapter 40: Feelings and... could it be...

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Caden

The ride home in a taxi was filled with silence and strange awkward glances. I didn't know if it was right of me to say anything after figuring out my feelings or if what he actually said referred to a particular person. I would be lying if I said I never believed for a second that he might be speaking of me but that was just... probably my heart twisting things to my satisfaction.

A sigh left my lips once more before I stole one glance at him while he wasn't looking. I could be in so much trouble with these feelings. There's a high possibility he doesn't feel the same way.

I mentally slapped myself. How could I? How could I have let myself fall for him? It's like the ultimate cliché plot. When did I start feeling this way? How could I not realise that everything was changing or maybe I did but never paid much attention to it. Either ways, I believe I'm doomed.

The taxi drew to a stop in front of our home and Blayze was first to step down before I did through the door by my side. Without looking up to him, I walked past the taxi and just as I drew closer to his stand, my eyes met his and I missed my step.

Crap!

I felt a grip around my waist and hand, looking up, I met his face.

"Are you okay?" His words sounded sincere... or does it?

I couldn't tell anymore if my mind was playing tricks on me. I'm putting meaning into his every action. My heart raced uncontrollably and I felt like a teenage girl all over again. My breath hard to normalize.

"Y-yes." I managed to speak up but in a rather low voice as I released myself from his hold.

Afterwards, I barely met his face and I couldn't tell if he was looking at me. I just didn't want to make a fool of myself one more time.

We walked into the mansion. I began making my way up the stairs and then sighted him going the other way, to his study room.

"Are you going to work?" I didn't even realise when I asked. He made a slight turn to me.

"Yes... Good night." He turned away and continued on his tracks. Exhausted and quite disappointed, I let out a sigh. Of course, he wasn't going to change overnight. Work still came first.

Shaking my head in disapproval, I made my way up the stairs.

Blayze

I worked through a few documents. Staring at the screen of my laptop, a memory came afresh in my head.

"Someone who believes I'm not a monster no matter what people say."

A sigh eluded my lips as I looked away in regret.

Why did I say that? I truly fell hard for Caden's games. I can't believe I made that comment.

I recalled her stare. The look in her eyes. They were soft, warm and comforting but then... I also recalled her silence. When I suggested we finally get a taxi home, she didn't object. She didn't say anything. Through the drive home, I remember stealing glances at her and it would seem she was uncomfortable.

Maybe I said too much. Somehow, I was making her uncomfortable and it only rendered awkwardness between us. For some reason, I hated it. She should be herself and I was to always remember the truth about our relationship.

I ran a hand through my hair before getting up on my feet and walking towards the window. I stared out only into the part that seemed hovered with darkness, no ray of light. I stared into nothing in particular.

She should have fallen asleep by now. I gave her the space she wanted.

Caden

I walked to and fro in the room, unable to stay still or to actually fall asleep. I took a look at the time. It was five minutes to midnight.

I stood still. Is he going to work all night?

Why do I even care?

I buried my face in my palms and muffled what would be a scream. It was frustrating feeling this way. I have to pretend like I wasn't the least bit interested in anything about his life. Without further thinking, I walked up to the door and took hold of the knob.

Stop!

A voice in my head screamed and I was torn between paying heed to it or my heart. In the end, I rested my head on the door, tired about fighting with myself.

I heard footsteps drawing closer. Could it be...

In a quick alert, I made a swift turn and took to my heels. In a rush, I jumped on the bed, covering myself with the duvet. The door opened and I was quick to feign sleep.

My heart raced beneath my chest as the door shut and footsteps drew closer. For a while, there was absolute silence. I couldn't tell what he was doing or what part of the room he was in. Sooner than later, I heard the door shut.

Did he step back out? Why?

I narrowed my brows a bit and slowly opened my eyes. My gradually looked around and when they fell on the unexpected, I froze. There he stood, a hand on the door knob into the bathroom. He stared back at me and I had no idea how to react in this situation. How did he figure out I feigning sleep?

Suddenly, he lowered his eyes, dropping his hand to his side, he turned away, heading for the door.

"Are you leaving?" I was quick to ask as I sat up.

"Yes." He replied without stopping or taking a look at me.

"Are you avoiding me?"

He stopped.

Caden, why are you doing this to yourself?

Suddenly, he made a turn.

"No." That was all and he was back on his way towards the door.

"Really? Prove it. Don't leave the room." I added quite adamant and watched as he stood still by the door. Yes, this was going to bite me back but at least, I'd be sure he wasn't really avoiding me because it somehow like he was.

He turned, walking back to me.

"To be clear, I don't have to prove anything to you and nothing is ever going to change that fact." His statement was filled with grudge and a bit of anger for someone who rarely loses his cool. It made me wonder why he was being different.

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