Hearts are never Broken {Pricefield} #wattys2016

Confessions

Chloe rapidly twitches her leg up and down until she hits the table with a smack and lets out a whispered curse. I take her hand in mine and try to comfort her.

"I need to confess something."

Chloe says staring at our laced fingers. My throat feels dry, I'm certain about two things. One, it will be about Rachel and two, it will make me want to scream at her.

"Rachel and I might have been a thing when I kissed you."

In my mind I can see myself throwing my silverware at Chloe without considering I could hurt her. I'm screaming until my lungs collapse, letting out painful noises of betrayal. My eyes are drier than a desert and sending lightning bolts to Chloe as I throw my plate at her, but in reality my eyes are filling themselves up with tears. I'm not even able to withdraw my hand from her grip. I just stare at her while tears start rolling down my cheeks and Chloe looks at me with regret. Without saying a word I stand up and walk towards the door without looking into those blue eyes. No longer are they the most beautiful thing I have ever been able to see, now I wish I had never stared into them and drowned. I was a fool for thinking Chloe wouldn't break my heart or hurt me, everyone disappoints you at some point, I shouldn't have thought Chloe would be different. Chloe rushes out of her booth and grabs me by the shoulder. I manuever my way out of her grip and step outside. She steps in front of me and tries to stop me but without looking at her, I walk past her as if she were a ghost.

Chloe grabs my shoulder and turns me around.

"Max, please hear me out."

Something in me explodes by the sound of her voice and I push her back.

"No! You don't get to fucking touch me! You don't even get to say my name not now!"

Chloe takes another step towards me and I take one too. She raises her eyebrows surprised by my intimidating move.

"I'm sorry."

I can't nor do I want to cry so I laugh instead. Mocking her apology.

"How dare you. I gave you all of me and you only gave me half of you."

I put my hand on her chest and push her back again.

"You don't get to be sorry," I say with fury in my voice.

"You weren't lied to, you didn't have to fight for love, you didn't give up your own happiness to see the one you love happy!"

Chloe dashes forward and hugs me.

"Rachel lied, I fought for you and I gave up one of my closest friends to be with you. Everything I did was for you Max."

I release myself out of her embrace and shake my head.

"I think it's best if we stop seeing each other for now."

And with those words I left Chloe stranded on the parking lot of the Two Whales. I wasn't planning on waiting on a bus just for Chloe to come up behind me and try to explain herself. Without thinking about school I make my way towards the lighthouse. The shining sun burns my skin yet I don't feel anything. I feel so much inside that my body couldn't feel at all.

Without a real purpose I walk through the forest to reach the cliff of the lighthouse.

When I finally arrive I simply throw my messenger bag on the ground and sit down on the bench. I put in my ear buds and start listening to random music. Of course the first song is Organs. For fuck's sake. I don't take out my ear buds or skip the song, I just listen to it. When you are in love you understand all the love songs, but when you get your heart ripped out they seem like foolish dreams. That's when songs about heartbreak start making sense and it hurts so much.

I bury my face in my hands and sob silently - even though I am all by myself I am still scared someone could hear me. Eventually the silent crying doesn't cut it so my sobs grow louder until I have no control over my whimpers anymore.

How could she? She never told me she was a thing with Rachel fucking Amber. How long did they even date? When I think back to Rachel's outburst it was either very short or really long.

God Chloe, why did you lie to me? I knew it was too good to be true but hell, Rachel? Really? I take my camera from my messy bag and start walking around the cliff to find something to capture. Something that doesn't remind me of Chloe for a while. After walking around for a while trying to find something picture worthy, I give up. When I sit down again to wallow in self pity my phone starts buzzing. I take my phone from my pocket and see "Kate" illuminated on my screen.

I pick up.

"Hey Kate," I answer as normal as possible.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Are you sure? Because class just started, and you aren't here. Neither is Chloe... I'm sorry, am I interrupting?"

Kate apologizes.

My eyes fill themselves with tears at the sound of her name. Why do I cry? I don't want to. She doesn't deserve my tears that lying piece of...

"Max? Are you crying?"

I wipe away my tears.

"What no? Why would you say that?"

My voice breaks halfway and Kate isn't stupid, she knows when I am doing horrible.

"Where are you? I'm coming over," she says with a concerned voice.

"At the lighthouse but I'm going to take a bus to my old home."

"I'll leave after this class."

"No Kate, you can't do that."

"I don't think missing one of Jeffersons classes is going to be a big deal. See you soon, Max."

And with that, Kate hangs up so that I can't protest. Maybe talking to Kate will be good for me.

At least I know she won't lie to me.