Good For Gone

Make It

I stood there for a moment, breathing deeply and hoping the smell of the plants would calm me down. But it didn't, I wanted to smash things. The rage that bubbled inside of me was new, I never got this angry. I didn't even know I could be this painfully mad.

I considered smashing one of the little plant pots but knew I would feel bad if I did. All I allowed myself was a swift kick of a wooden crate as I walked towards the door.

I burst out of the greenhouse, granting myself a few curious looks from passersby, but that wasn't my main concern at that moment.

I needed to let Peter know but I was afraid they would follow me to him if they didn't know where he was already.

I opted to walk back to my room for lack of a better idea. Part of me was tempted to get Peter and drive away, but I knew Randall would have my family killed before I could get to them.

Miriam was sitting at her desk when I got there.

"You okay?" She asked, looking worried at the sight of my wild eyes.

"Yeah, um," an idea sparked in my brain and I ran over to my desk and scrambled for a pen, "Can you do something for me?"

"I have a class at 2:15."

"It will be really quick I promise," I said scribbling on a crinkly dollar bill.

"Sure," she said, "Are you sure you're okay?"

I turned around to look at her worried face, "I need some help, but you can't ask why."

"That's so sketchy."

"Yes it is, but I don't have any other choice." I pleaded. We never hung out together, so they wouldn't suspect her of anything, "Just go get some coffee at the Java Lab and while you're there drop this off in the alleyway near it, the one with all the people hanging out in it. Just give it to one of them, especially if it's a guy playing guitar."

She looked doubtful, "So you want me to get you coffee?"

"No, just make sure you get the coffee first."

"But I don't want coffee."

I took a deep breath, trying to keep calm, "Get whatever you want, just make sure you get it before you drop this off."

"Am I giving it to anyone in particular, like should I ask for a name?"

"No, don't say who you are or who I am. Don't say anything. Just drop it there and get away as fast as you can. Make it look like you didn't even think about it."

"This makes me nervous." Her eyebrows knitted together and my heart sank. This was too much to ask.

But, to my relief she just shrugged and plucked the bill out of my hand, "You have to wash all of my mugs for the rest of the year."

"Deal," I sighed and then hugged her tightly.

She just laughed and said, "okay weirdo."

I let her go and she gathered up her stuff and left.

When the door closed behind her I felt lost. I was hyped up on anxiety and all I wanted to do was run all the way home and make sure my family was still there and okay.

I decided that I could get away with a simple "hello how are you" text.

Cam answered within a minute talking about how much she hated writing papers and other high school related problems.

I let out a breath of relief, she was completely unaware of anything, which was comforting enough.

My parents responded a few minutes later with similar levels of obliviousness which soothed my anxieties a bit more.

I got up and began pacing around and fidgeting with random things. He said I had to move out of my room, but I was calling his bluff. He couldn't just uproot me from my life, plus I was a freshman so I had to live on campus, it was a rule.

I had a class to go to, but I was afraid to leave the room. The feeling of being watched made my skin crawl, and now I knew he must have been doing it for a long time.

I took off my shoes and crawled into my bed, pressing my back against the wall and pulling the blanket up to my chin. It was a sad attempt at feeling safe, but I didn't have any better ideas.

I tried watching some shows on my laptop but I couldn't keep my attention focused on them. I kept thinking about Peter, hoping he was safe but also doubting it.

If they had been watching me that long they were bound to know where he was, I spent too much time with him for them not to. My only hope was that the warning got to him before they could do anything.

I texted my parents again, making up some story about how my car was making weird noises.

Their responses were what I expected, my dad asked me a bunch of other question about the vehicle and my mom asked me why I was under the impression she would know that.

I made up vague answers to both of their questions and set my phone aside. They were okay for now, there was only one person who's fate I didn't know.

My brain tried conjuring up images of him getting the note and making an escape in order to soothe myself. But there were plot holes in my story.

If he didn't get it there wasn't much I could do anymore. I had to make my instructions for Miriam vague for her safety. But what if my instruction lacked so much detail that it wasn't even worth doing?

I was too scared to even text her about it. Randall knew a lot and it still wasn't clear exactly how he'd figured it all out.

I tried painting my nails, even going as far as to apply base and top coats, which was way more effort than I usually put forth for this particular activity.

When those dried I did my toes too, but still there was no news to speak of. It almost didn't feel real anymore.

Until I heard my phone buzz.

When oh picked it up it was a message from Miriam, which relieved me a bit, at least she was okay.

But when I opened it the text there was only one line.

She didn't make it