The Loser in the End--The Sequel

Panic Mode

Brian was relaxing at home later that night when Andy came knocking on his door again.

"Oh," Brian said irritably, "It's you again. What now?"

"I saw your little girlfriend over here earlier," he drawled. "You gave her a key?"

"Uh, obviously."

"Just checking," Andy said steadily, "You know, for security purposes."

"Security purposes my ass," Brian chided. "You're just a nosy little shit."

"Hmm," Andy said, ignoring the insult. "Well, you might be interested to know Freddie paid her a visit while she was here.  They were in here alone together for quite awhile..."

Brian's face turned white, secretly pleasing Andy.  

"Ok, thanks," Brian said, clearly miffed. "Now just go home and mind your own business."

What the fuck, Brian thought after closing the door. What the hell was Freddie doing over here? And what had you and he done together? 

"I'm not going to put up with this," he muttered out loud.

He paced back and forth, wondering what his next move should be. He went to the fridge to check on the wine.

"I knew it," he said furiously. "That bottle was full when I left this morning. She's drinking behind my back, and lord knows what else."

In a panic, he ran into the bedrooms, checking the beds for any tell-tale signs of use. He sighed in relief as he noticed everything was just as he left it this morning. He looked around the rest of the apartment, and everything was in its place. Satisfied no sex had occurred, he relaxed a little. Still, he couldn't allow this kind of thing to happen again. He didn't trust you around Freddie at all.

***************************************************************

You knew Brian was probably home from the studio by now, and you called him. You had to confront him about his lie. You couldn't wait any longer.

"Hello," Brian answered the phone, sounding stressed.

"Brian," you started, "Can I come over? There's something I need to talk to you about."

"Yes, that's a good idea," he said stiffly. "I need to talk to you as well."

What on earth did he want to talk to you about? Whatever it was, it didn't sound good judging by Brian's formal manner. You were suddenly nervous.

When Brian opened the door, his greeting was cooler than it usually was. He wasted no time with small talk.

"So I've been informed you had a visitor here earlier," he said in a measured tone.

"You've been 'informed'"? What the hell...you thought to yourself.

"Having Andy as a neighbor is proving to be a very valuable asset," Brian said, towering over you.

"So now you have him spying on me?" you said, your hackles rising. "What gives you the right?"

"I'm your boyfriend, or do I need to remind you?"

Now you were pissed. You hadn't seen this side of him before.

"The next time Freddie tries to come over, you tell him he's not allowed to visit when I'm not here," he said sternly.

"You can't be serious," you said incredulously.

"Oh, believe me, I'm very serious.  I won't have it.  And another thing, I noticed the bottle of wine in the fridge is half empty. You know wine is to be enjoyed with dinner only--certainly not in the middle of the day, and certainly not when you're alone with Freddie."

"You have so many rules, it's hard for me to remember them all," you said defiantly.  "But while we're on the subject of  rules, I have a big one."

"Is that so?" he mocked. "And what might that be?"

"It's simple:  No lying."

"I've never lied to you," he said, looking down his nose.

You would have believed him if you didn't know any better.

"Oh really," you said. "Well I guess you have a bad memory then, because you lied to me when you said you told Freddie I was living here in New York."

"Is that what Freddie said? How can you believe anything he says when he's fucked up all the time?"

"Brian, stop," you sighed in frustration.  "You lied to me.  Admit it, or I'm walking through that door right now and I'm not coming back."

Brian was busted, and he was smart enough to know he couldn't  continue the lie.  He suddenly became very contrite.  In situations like this, he would play his vulnerable card.  It always worked.

"Ok, I lied," he admitted.  "But I was afraid if Freddie knew you lived here, he'd contact you, and then I would never stand a chance...a chance I've been waiting for for 10 years..."

Had you been too hard on him?  Perhaps.  You could feel yourself beginning to waiver, but you caught yourself.  The fact was, although you cared greatly for Brian,  you were beginning to realize he was a total control freak.  In his sneaky way, he had somehow gained control over your life.

 Brian was cool and calm on the outside, but inside he was going into panic mode. The time had come for him to do something drastic...