latibule ➳ bucky barnes

14. trust

As soon as the elevator doors closed Bucky regretted everything he said and did. He punched the elevator wall with his metal hand, creating an evident dent that Tony wouldn't be too happy to discover.

"Mr Barnes, your heart rate is high. Would you like me to notify Doctor Volkov?" Asked the A.I. system.

"No!" said Bucky, shutting his eyes and breathing heavily, "not... Yet." He leaned his forehead against the wall, letting the elevator take him to the roof. He didn't know why he chose the roof, it was one of Anastasia's favourite locations in the tower and New York and it only reminded him of her. However, he felt drawn to the location. His mind screamed at him to stop, but his body just automatically brought him there.

He walked over to the railings and leaned his arms against it, staring at the city below. Anastasia described it as beautiful, rows of golden lights created in a way that it imitated the labyrinth of streets. But then again, Anastasia called everything beautiful. That was one of the many qualities he loved about Anastasia, she found beauty in everything.

His mind drifted back to their argument and he felt the guilt in his heart strengthened. He ran a hand through his hair, trying to forget the hurt look on Anastasia's face. However, he couldn't. It was plastered on his mind.

He felt horrible for snapping at Anastasia like that, though to be fair he had a good reason to. If Chase was going to live with them, he had every right to know why, and who she was. All he knew about her was that she was very dangerous and her knowledge on HYDRA made her a suspicious person.

"For an assassin you're exceptionally easy to sneak up on."

Bucky tensed immediately when he heard that voice. He saw Chase standing behind him, giving him a disappointed look.

That alone annoyed him.

"What do you want?" He hissed.

"For you to understand." Said Chase, "that... Everything Ana does, it has reason."

"I find that hard to believe when she can't even tell me what those reasons are." Bucky scoffed.

"Look..." Chase sighed, "she isn't telling you anything not because she doesn't... Trust you but... She's afraid."

"Afraid of what?" Asked Bucky, more concerned than angry at this point.

"Afraid of losing you." Chase stated, "what she's keeping from you... It's a fact she tends to steer away from and... She's not proud of it. You know her, she's never been the most confident person."

Bucky stayed silent as Chase continued to explain for Anastasia's sake why she refused to tell him this secret of hers, but all he could think about was the fact that she didn't tell him because of her own insecurities. It was selfish in a way, which was shocking considering Anastasia was such a selfless person, but it was also upsetting.

Here was this woman, who had no idea how incredible she was, who had no idea how much she's done for everyone, who had no idea just how special she was to everyone.

Who had no idea just how special she was to him.

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A frown formed on Anastasia's face when she looked up at the darkened sky. It was blank, without any stars. With such pollution and light, it was rare, almost impossible to see anything in the sky. Though she had lived in big cities for most of her life, Anastasia could still never get rid of the disappointment whenever she was greeted with an empty sky.