Fleeting Thoughts

Real life problems.

Title: real life problems

Warning : some of the context in this may be triggering to some. Read at your own risk.

So the topic I'm going to be discussing today is self-mutilation aka self-harm.

Overall, this is just me discussing my exprerience,and answering questions I have been asked about before. As well and other things in relation to the topic.

I was watching a few videos, not sure which channel it was cause the guy has a few... it was either onision or uhohbro. 

The videos made me question a lot of things with myself as well as I agreed on some of the things he pointed out, but at the same to contradicted. 

He had a major point with people posting images of their wrists or whatever body part they decided to cut themselves. Or quotes that were posted. I had to agree, instead of posting things onto the internet that are triggering they should seek help form professionals.

At the same time, though, I understand that those who post things on the internet just want someone to notice, or even relate to them. They're probably feeling alone in the world. Or are seeking help through other methods... which by doing so (in that way) would only make things worse, in my opinion.

Anyway, moving on. 

Questions I ask myself when people do harm themselves are:

Why do you do it? 

Why hurt yourself?

What's the point?

Do you regret doing it?

etc

And to be honest, I'm just a hypocrite. So here are my answers to the questions 

Why do you do it? - well for me, I would do it as a means to punish myself because I felt no empathy or compassion towards myself. I would do it to release all the negativity inside of me. I would do it because i hated myself and didnt care what happened. But there are also times when I would disosiate from reality and never realized I was doing it, and that was fkn scary. There were many reasons why I did it... Though I never did it out of addiction or becasue I wanted to. I know some people would criticize and say I need help. Well for your information I already have help, but I'm reality I need to help myself first before anyone else can help me.

Why hurt yourself? - i don't really know how to answer this without confusing people. But to put it short,  I never intended to hurt myself. Makes no sense, I know. But like kaneki said, its better to be hurt than to hurt others. 

What's the point? Yeah... this is a bit vague, but there are many self claimed points in doing it, and at the same time no point at all, logically. No good comes from it, it leaves scars, hurts, brings back unwanted memories, etc. 

Do you regret doing it? - Of course, but at other times no.

I used to harm myself at a very young age. Probably when I was around 6-8 years old. I would pull out my hair, scratch, bite, hit myself. It was only a few years back did I actually take it to another level.

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Now here is my perception as to why people self harm.

It's come to my attention that self harm has always been an issue, no matter what genration or  what age group, or gender. Though I have discovered that self harm is now affecting younger people as it has done so to myself. There are many reason why I think people harm themselves, some similar to mine or entirely different. 

●makes you feel more alive when feeling numb or dead inside.

●to release negative feelings.

●some people cannot cry, therefore let the blood be their tears.

●a sense of control.

●a cry for help.

etc.

Self harm needs more awareness as it is affecting more and more people everyday, not many people know what to do, or know where to seek the right kind of help. 

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If you've got questions just pm me, or if you need someone to talk to message my anytime. 

By the way if there is anything else you guys would like me to post in relation to Real life problems, post down below. It can be anything like gender, sexuality, mental illness, etc. 

I'm doing this because I want to bring awareness, support and to let people know they're not alone.