Marriage by Bravery - Book 3

Chapter Four

As requested (demanded really) by lovebooksmusiclife92...enjoy <3

Luca

I found myself in a tailspin after that kiss, both kisses to be exact. It was clear I had lost my usually logical thinking mind. That was the only feasible explanation for the second kiss that I instigated. Yes, it had to be madness. A madness that was blinding, deafening and utterly sense numbing in nature, yes, that was exactly what I had contracted in the sheer moment of insanity that had led me to kiss her. I felt much better after reassuring myself that I was indeed suffering from some kind of brain lapse or at least that was what I was telling myself.

You know there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, other than the fact that you are totally besotted with the woman, argued my conscience that was now present yet conveniently absent when I had needed it to keep me from doing something we both knew I shouldn't have.

Damn it! I thought in despair. I was referring to myself as 'we'; this was actual proof that I was indeed losing my mind.

The slamming of my front door brought me back to the present to find that I was still standing outside where Kim had left me dumbfounded after our second kiss, the kiss that I had taken from her. I sighed in frustration and started walking towards the back of my property, where I had been when Mr Hanson first informed me that I had a guest.

You know you don't regret answering that call, my mind boasted smugly.

I spent the remainder of the day swimming laps in the pool to clear my head of everything. No thoughts of Anabel, none of the wedding and most especially zero thoughts of Kimberly.

If you think, you'll drown. If you think, you'll drown. If you think, you'll drown. I chanted the words in my head until they blended together and became a pleasant buzz that kept my mind totally blank, just as I wanted, no needed it to be.

I was unsure of the time when I finally exited the pool. I made my way into the house and before I could stop myself, I found that Kim and the possible location of her room were drifting through my head. With a determination I had forgotten I possessed, I increased my pace, not slowing down until I had locked myself safely in my room. I immediately began pacing the carpeted floors and telling myself that I only wanted to know where her room was so I could make sure it wasn't too close to mine. That would make it much easier to avoid her, which was exactly what I intended to do; avoid her. I silently prayed that Mrs Hanson had put her in a room at the other end of the house.

Needing to further occupy my time before I did something exceeding all of the foolish things I had done so far today, I decided that I would call my little brother. I had a sinking feeling that he'd had a great deal to do with Kimberly's presence here, by which I meant his wife had all ten of her fingers tangled up in this situation and so he was involved by default.

The phone rang twice before he picked up.

"Brother, how are you?" he asked casually as if nothing was wrong.

That slimy son of my own mother!

"I'm doing well little brother," I said, deciding to play along for a moment, "how are my nephews and my favourite sister-in-law doing?"

"She's your only sister-in-law," he laughed, "and the boys are absolutely great. Although according to a book called "Parenting Twins" that Lia made me read, they won't be so great for much longer."

I laughed at that, finding joy in his impending misery since he so casually and cruelly caused mine.

"By the way, you'll never guess who arrived at the estate today!" I said with genuine mirth as I prepared to hear my brother's blatant lies.

"Oh, who?" he asked lightly, but I could hear the slightly higher pitch his voice took on as it only did when he tried to lie to me or our parents.

"Kimberly Howard."

"Hmm, Kimberly. Kimberly. Kimberly?"

"Come on now brother, you remember Kimberly."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive, you know, slender, cute, redheaded, best friend of your wife, the woman who lived in your house for about two months."

"Ohhh, that Kimberly! What a coincidence, how is good old Kimmy? Wait, you think she's cute?" he asked in an interested and no longer guilty tone. I could hear snickering in the background, which meant my sister was in the room and also had gotten a very pleasing little piece of information to share with a certain redheaded invader.

I couldn't help but laugh at his antics and at my own blunder for letting that information slip out. Surprisingly, I found that I wasn't in the least bit upset with my brother because deep down I knew he wouldn't have gone behind my back if he didn't genuinely feel he was doing something that was in my best interest. I decided that I might as well confide in him since he was on the phone and understood me better than most. Not to mention I was one hundred per cent sure Kimberly had already contacted her friends and told them everything that had transpired between us from the moment she arrived, which meant the possibility that my brother already knew everything I was preparing myself to tell him was very high.

I took a deep breath and delved into my tale or moral woe. To his credit, Damian remained silent throughout my entire spiel until I had run out of things to vent about.

"Luca, I hope I don't have to tell you the obvious." He said in a serious tone.

I smirked, "Humour me."

"Well it's clear that there is far more than just mutual lust between you two or she would already be on a plane back to New York," he said, suddenly making me wish I hadn't called.

Admitting something to your self was one thing, but having another person say it to you out loud was a whole other story. I really didn't need anyone to tell me that Kimberly had reached me in a way that no other woman ever had, or ever would if I could prevent it. And to be honest I wasn't sure I was ready to explore that just yet.

Sensing the decline in my mood, Damian changed the topic and began telling me of all the progress the boys had been making along with the many hare-brained schemes Amelia and Xanaia had gotten up to.

By the time we got off the phone it was long past supper. I decided that this was a blessing in disguise as I wouldn't have to go out of my way to avoid Kim. I went down to the kitchen and found that Mrs Hanson had already prepared a plate for me and left it in the microwave.

That woman is a godsend, I thought to myself as I settled into my meal.

With nothing but the sound of my utensils clinking to fill the silence I had plenty of time to think about what I was going to do for the duration of Kimberly's stay. I was definitely going to need to steer clear of her for a few days to get my thoughts together.

One thing I knew for sure was that there was no way I could go through with this wedding until I either convinced myself that I was doing the right for myself and my family, or convince Kim that what we had wasn't going to amount to anything. I couldn't cancel the wedding, not marrying Anabel wasn't an option for the moment; I had to see this through no matter what.

I could not say for sure what would prove to be the more daunting task and so I pushed all of it to the back of my mind as I cleaned up the kitchen and returned to my room to prepare for bed. A good night's sleep would surely help me get even a few small steps closer to making a decision that would affect more people than I cared to think about right now.

After an especially cold shower, I laid back on my bed and fell into a deep, well needed rest.