Pocò A Pocò || TO BE REWRITTEN ||

[ 4 ]

A/N: This chapter is not edited. Kindly ignore the errors.

Thanks to Reema826 for the amazing banner.

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(Next day)

It was a Wednesday. There was Moral Science period at first but SK did not teach us any moral values Rather, she let us watch YouTube videos in the Educomp smart class.  We enjoyed this nature of ma'am and I loved her for this.

But I wasn't watching videos. I was working on my plan while sitting alone in the last bench. The plan was that- 

1. I would be writing my feelings about the day before's incident in my pocket diary, about how I before felt for Pawan and the then present situation. 

2. I would give the notes to Rainika (yes, I did make good relations with that slut but she was no longer a slut to me), who sat close to Pawan, and she would pass it to Pawan, asking him if he knew who wrote the notes. And obviously Pawan would say that he didn't know. Then she would pressurize him to read that and he would, I guess. He had to. Rainika would make him do.

3. By reading that, he would recognize the handwriting and would know that those were written by me. He would understand how I felt for him. Then, he might feel sorry for me, so would try to impress me and at last, I would accept him and there goes the happy ending.

But, as always, my life can never have a happy ending. 

It so happened that Rainika didn't understand what I had told her to do and as a result, she told Pawan that I had sent a love letter to him while giving those papers. And guess what? Because of her, everyone got to know about this spicy news.

Then how did I react to this? I was completely frustrated with the constant stares that everyone gave me. God, I felt so awkward and mad about the fact that Pawan played an even bigger role in spreading the news. I mean, whenever someone would ask him if I had really sent him a love letter, he would say, 'yes, she did'. 

I don't understand how people assume a note started with "Dear Diary" to be a love letter. Don't they have brains to think that that piece of paper can be a page from someone's diary? I made this plan because I thought people would have this much brain. But no, I was wrong.

One time, it happened that I became super mad on Pawan because he was showing that paper to his friends. So I called him outside the class for a minute.

'Where's that paper?' I asked Pawan as soon as I got out with him.

'Which paper?' He a answered with innocence on his face like he didn't know anything.

'I'm not here to joke. You know very well which paper I'm talking about.'

'What? That one? I threw it in the dustbin long back ago.'

Oh god. How can he be so calm about it? Oh it's my issue not ours, I remember.

'Which dustbin?' I asked again.

'The one near the staff room.'

I thought what to say next but I was too angry to say something good. So without saying a thing, I turned on my heel and went back to my classroom.

Then, I started thinking if Pawan really didn't love me. Because neither did he feel sorry for me nor did he try to impress me. This implied to only one thing- he didn't love me. But I still couldn't believe that he didn't love me. Because I hadn't heard it from his own mouth. I had to hear it from his own mouth to let him go out of my heart. 

So I again made a plan. This time not to win his love or something but to know the truth. 

* * * * *

After the last bell rang, I followed Pawan out of the school. The moment when there was no one around him, I called him again.

'Hey Pawan! Wait up!'

He stopped and looked back. 

'Yes?'

'I need to ask you something.'

'What?'

'Do you love me?'

'No.'

'Okay. Thank you.'

And there goes my first heart break.

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