Spencer Reid One Shots

Pedal Stools

"Celebrity stalkers still just make me feel really REALLY skeevy."

"I know. Although surely any kind of stalkers should make you feel like that?"

Spencer glanced over from the passenger seat of your car. You were giving him a ride home after your latest case, he only lived a couple of blocks from you so it made sense to carpool together.

"Well yeah, but I don't know. Celeb stalkers, like the ones who get THAT delusional and possessive, and you know; who kidnap them like the one we just caught. They just have that extra layer of skeevyness. I mean how mental is it to put someone on that high a pedal stool?"

Out of the corner of your eye you saw Spencer frown, his lips moving silently. He shook his head quickly.

"Just say that again?" he asked you as you came to a stop sign.

"Which part?" was he not listening? That wasn't like him at all.

"The last part."

You recalled your words quickly "Erm... That it's mental when people put someone on that high of a pedal stool."

Spencers lips twitched as you waited for the lights to change, and he stifled a laugh.

"That's what I thought you said" his shoulders were shaking slightly now.

"What?" you were confused "Why are you laughing at me?"

He shook his head again as you pulled away from the lights.

"Pedal stool? " was all he could say, repeating it a few times. For someone so intelligent, you were concerned that he was questioning the word.

"Yeah. Pedal stool. Where you admire someone so much so you set them on a pedal stool?"

His faced creased and a loud belly laugh escaped his mouth as you looked on incredulously.

"Spencer...What's so funny?"

"Pedal stool.... Oh my God... Pedal stool...." he couldn't stop laughing so you signalled, pulling over to the side of the road.

"Reid.... REID! I don't get it."

"It's... it's not a pedal stool. It's pedestal. You put some one on a pedestal. Oh shit, Y/N. All I can imagine is a stool with little wheels on it" he wiped away tears from the corners of his eyes, still shaking with laughter.

"But... That's what I said. Pedal stool. Isn't that what it is? So like, you'd set them on the stool so you can wheel them about and admire them?"

That set him off again and you looked on crossly, waiting for him to regain his composure which didn't seem to be happening any time soon. He just kept shaking his head and going to speak, then collapsing into giggles again.

"A stool... With wheels..... So you can wheel them.... Hahahaha. You really thought... Oh god....pedal stool. PEDAL STOOL!"

You leant over the centre console and thumped his leg. Hard.

"Stop laughing at me. And explain."

He breathed deeply a few times, before coughing to clear his throat.

"The term is pedestal. P.E.D.E.S.T.A.L." he spelt the word out for you slowly, watching your face fall as you realised.

"It's one word Y/N. To put someone on a pedestal means 'Give someone uncritical respect or admiration; treat someone as an ideal rather than a real person'. It's not an actual stool with.... " he snickered again "wheels."

"Oh."

"Yes, oh."

"Well there was no need to laugh, you could have just told me."

"You're 28 years old. I just find it ridiculously hard to believe that you don't understand the word pedestal. PEDAL STOOL" he started laughing again, grabbing his sides.

"Get out the car."

"What? No... " he stopped suddenly.

"Stop laughing at me or get out the car." You told him, deadly serious.

"But we're still 7.4 miles from my apartment. And it's raining."

"Exactly."

He looked at you sensing that he was irritating you.

"Okay fine. I'm sorry. Please don't make me walk."

"Are you done laughing?"

He pressed his lips tightly together, trying to suppress another smile as he nodded. You signalled away from the curb, pulling out slowly and continuing on your journey.

Seconds later you heard a whisper "pedal stool"

"SPENCER!"