Chapter 30

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"Listen, I want you to burn my bridges down
I said, I want you to burn my bridges down
Set me on fire."
—Burning Bridges// One Republic


******

So this was the end, Brittney thought.

As she came out of the hospital along with her parents, her heart felt heavy. She never thought she would have to leave Erthington without having resolved issues with someone. She was the goody two-shoes, always good to everyone.

Maybe Katherine was right; she'd gain nothing holding up grudges against people she'll probably never meet again. It'd only make her heart heavy, like it was already.

"Brittney.... hey!...Brittney.." She heard a voice in the distant, calling her.

Her mother tapped on her shoulder. "A boy is calling you."

She turned around, to find an almost running Michael Adams, approaching her.

She felt a jolt inside her stomach. For one split second something inside her made her want to run towards him forgetting everything. But she restrained herself.

"Mom, dad, let's go."

"But he is calling you." Her mother seemed surprised.

"And I don't want to see his face!" She opened the door to the backseat of their car, and was about to get in when she heard the voice again. This time right behind her.

"Wait...please." He was panting. "We need to talk. Please."

"Mom, get on the driver's seat. I wanna get the hell out of here."

Her parents looked at each other, not knowing what to do. So her father asked the boy: "What's the matter, boy?"

"Jeez, dad, just get in the car already."

"Brittney, what's going on?"

"Sir, it won't take more than just five minutes. I have to talk to her."

"But -"

"I'm her friend. I'm Michael, Michael Adams."

Mr and Mrs. Claire's facial expressions changed. "Oh, so you are.."

Her parents seemed to be at a loss for words. And maybe it was because they had took sympathy on the boy or his father, or because they were never rude to anyone, Brittney's father requested her to talk to him.

"Dad, there's nothing to talk about."

"Okay, but just hear him out. You're not coming back anytime soon."

Brittney came out of the car quite reluctantly. He gestured her to follow him, and walked until they were a little far away from the car. She suspected he was trying to be out of the earshot of her parents.

Then he faced her. Brittney realized this was the first time she was seeing him formally. At 6 ft, he appeared very tall in front of her. His brown hair looked dirty and messy, there were a few stitches on his skinny arms. When her eyes met him, she found him checking her out too.

"Hey." She just nodded in reply.

"Look, I know you are angry at me. It's understandable. But uh-" He struggled for the right words. "I also want to let you know that I've given your words a thought. And I think you are right."

She just looked at him, not being able to comprehend what he was saying.

"I got discharged this morning, and was waiting here all this time to talk to you."

"Me?" She spoke for the first time, feeling utterly surprised.

"Brittney, I'm so sorry about my behavior last night. I wasn't thinking straight. I woke in a hospital bed, and realized I had failed again. I was so frustrated! And disappointed. If you weren't there, I might have had even attempted again."

A chill ran down her spine.

"But you are right. After you were gone, my dad came. You know, I had never seen him so broken, so torn, so vulnerable. He looked worse than the time my Stefan had passed away.

"Brittney, right then and there I started thinking I actually could have reasons to live for. Maybe, just maybe, I shouldn't have judged my parents, you know. They had sacrificed their priorities for me. They had stayed together in a failed marriage for me. It wasn't right to blame them the way I did."

Brittney wanted to say so many things all at a time. But she did not utter any.

So he continued: "And to think of the reasons I want to live for, I have a great father who I have been mean to in the past years. I really want to better my mistakes. I have a career. I have a life ahead that can just be as great as I want to."

Then probably noticing how she was not saying anything, he said to  her, "Won't you say anything?"

"Well, where are these oh-so-great thoughts coming from? Last time I checked you were this depressed boy who was being really rude to me."

He smiled a little. "You know I haven't slept even a bit yesterday night."

She looked closely. Yes, he definitely looked tired, there were dark circles around the pale skin of his eyes.

"And when you are awake and have nothing good to do, these thoughts come up in your head." He continued, "And I started thinking too, how it must be a miracle that I got saved every time I tried to kill myself.

"I don't believe in God much, but now that I come to think of it, there must be a reason why I failed at my every attempt of suicide. It's maybe because there are still works left for me to do here. I should rather try to pass in them, than try and fail in this again and again."

His words touched her. She realized couldn't be angry at him, even if she wanted to.

"Moreover Einstein had said stupidity is to repeat same things over and over and expect different results."

She could not suppress a smile this time. "I'm happy for you, then," she said, beaming at him.

He gently caught hold of her hands and fitted them into his. She looked surprised by this sudden act.

"And the greatest reason to live for might just be..you."

Wide eyed, she looked and looked at him. His shimmering green eyes never left hers.

"The girl I barely know, but the same girl who never gave up on me. Someone I pushed away, but always made me realize there might still be hope in this darkness."

"There always is." She remarked.

"So, would it be too much to ask for if I say I want to know you better?"

"Uh—"

"Because I think I am starting to like you. A lot."

******

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