Chapter 10

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Considering how late we went to sleep, I wasn't surprised to see the sun high in the afternoon sky when I woke. I also wasn't surprised when I felt the sweat already collecting at my back and making me uncomfortable. I blinked a few times, trying to adjust to the sun. I turned my head to see that Mr. Rush and I were laying away from each other. Though slightly disappointing, how else were we suppose to subconsciously act when the sun beat down on us?

I sat up and stretched. Unlike last night, I was happy to be shirtless and in just a bra. It was a slight help, but I was still very hot. I ended up walking out to the ocean from where we were sleeping since it wasn't far away. I felt the cool water against my toes and stepped in until it was up to my kneecaps. At that point, I stopped and cupped my hands together, filling my palms with the salty water. After splashing it over myself, I ran my wet hands through my gross hair until it became damp.

I straightened myself afterward and looked out. The waves curled over as they came closer, curving and turning white at its crest. The sound would have been relaxing; it was to an extent. However as minutes passed and it hit my ears more, it also hit my chest in a swirl of emotions. It was turning into a teasing reminder that that sound would always be surrounding us, in warning and recognition. Leaving this place was impossible and hopeless.

As I looked across, it finally hit home. After days of blocking it out... I was facing it now.

The sight before me held a beautiful and endless blue that seemed so powerful. With no end and no hope, it would ever end. This ocean — this place — was too big for us to beat. It was so cruel despite the beauty of it all. I sank into the realization that we will never leave this place, which was fine with me and my life. But my father and brother would never pay since I was the only one who knew they killed my mom. I was planning on one day proving that they were guilty of it because my mom deserved that justice. She was always there for me, and I owed that to her.

Then there was the other tragedy of it: Mr. Rush would never have the life he deserved. He deserved his future wife and children. He deserved to have a chance to pick what he would want to do for the rest of his life. Now I knew that would not happen. For some reason, Mr. Rush not living his life and dying here killed me as much, if not more, as the thought of my dad and brother going unpunished.

That last thought led to what I have been trying to avoid this whole time. It wasn't just me, my family, Mr. Rush, and his future that changed after the crash. Every single person that was on that plane... their lives actually ended. Their families' lives are what changed. Though it was hard knowing that we were stuck here, it was a blessing compared to actually losing our lives. I grew up with some of those kids. Grew up and went to school with many of them. Not just students lost their lives, the pilots, flight attendants, chaperones, and other teachers. Every single one of those people had lives, unique to them and their personality. Each of them had family and friends that loved them. Each of them had futures from which they were taken from.

I don't know how long I stared at the suffocating blue. I realized it must have been for a while. When I noticed there were tears streaming from my eyes, I realized that they had gone cold by now. This world was so cruel and beautiful. Cruel and beautiful. That seemed to be something that was crossing my mind more and more.

I turned around and headed back up the beach. When I got back, I took in Mr. Rush, who was now awake. He sat up from where he rested and looked around until his eyes fell on me. He gave me a small smile that instantly dropped as I came closer. "What's wrong?"

I thought for a minute about what to say. Then I settled on acting as if I didn't know what he was talking about. "Nothing. Why?"

His face darkened as he stared into my eyes. That gaze penetrated my confusion at his question. "There is no reason to hide things from me now," he stated simply.

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