The Marauders: Year Two | #Wattys2016

Hash and Barm

Hash and Barm

Remus turned out to be quite good at cooking, having learned from Hope as a young boy. He whipped together some hash and barm cakes from leftovers he and Lyall had been eating during the week and put a heaping plate of it before Sirius as quick as possible. "Here you are, mate," he said, "Eat up, you'll feel better once you do. It sort of tuckers you out, having all your bones reshapen themselves like that, yeah?"

"I never dreamed how much so," Sirius replied, diving into the food with an eager fork.

Remus finished making food for him and James as well and set himself down at the table, leaving some warming on the stove for Lyall when he woke up. "So did Bubo show you where I live, then?" he asked conversationally.

"Yeah," James said with a nod, "She's a good owl."

"She is," Remus agreed. "How's your dad doing after the run-in with the Death Eaters? Dad heard about it at the Ministry when he went into work. It's all they can talk about there. The aurors are looking into getting a warrant on Malfoy Manor to look for stuff to do with the Dark Arts."

Sirius snorted, "They must be going mad purging the place," he said. He grinned, "Damn I missed being able to put my two cents in!" He turned to James and said, "You and those bloody dog songs - what were you playing at with that?"

James grinned. "I still say Martha might've been a good companion for you, mate, if you hadn't changed back."

"Still might check into it sometime," Sirius winked. "If she's lovely enough."

Remus looked up from the barm he was ripping. "I'm sorry, you don't reckon you're going to have another go at that insane idea?"

"Of course we are!" James and Sirius both said at once. Sirius grinned. "I want to see what I look like as a full deer or buck or elk or whatever the bloody hell I'm to be with my horns on."

Remus shook his head.

"His horns are quite divine," said Sirius. "Go on and show him, James."

James tapped his nose with his wand, "Muture mangus animus!" he announced and - crack! - two horns had sprouted up out of his head.

Remus couldn't help but look impressed as James put his arms up to balance them. "Aren't they neat?" he asked, grinning. "I like them. I'm thinking of naming them."

"Naming your horns?" Remus asked with a laugh, "Whyever for?"

"Dunno," James said, "But I feel as though the left one might be named Oscar."

There was a creak on the stairs and Remus looked about. "It's my dad. Tell Oscar and whatever the other one's name is to go away! Quick!"

"Muture mangus humanus!" James hissed. Crack! - The horns were gone.

"Philip," whispered Sirius, "I think the other one's named Philip."

"Good morning!" said Lyall, stepping into the kitchen with a surprised look about, "And who might this be?" He looked at James and Sirius with curiosity. "Philip, did I hear you say?"

Sirius snickered.

Ignoring Sirius, Remus smiled, "Dad, these are my best mates, James Potter and Sirius Black."

Lyall's face lit up. "James Potter, yes - I know your father, Charlus. He works on the pattening commission at the Ministry... and he's been working on that tonic - that hair tonic --"