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"'One can never have enough socks,'" said Dumbledore. "'Another Christmas has come and gone and I didn't get a single pair. People will insist on giving me books.'" ― J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone

DEDICATION: voidreese for the sweetest votes and comments I've ever read, which always put a smile on my face. Thank you, lovely! <3

"I-I can't feel my s-snowballs."

"Just because you add 'snow' before a word, doesn't make it festive."

"S-Seriously though, h-how can you year rounders s-stand being human p-popsicles all the time?"

"That's a secret, Chipmunk!"

"Brr, d-do you know a-any way to warm up?"

"From what? The snow or Penelope's attitude?"

"F-Frankly, I don't see a difference."

"Ooh, roasted! I'm surprised that burn alone didn't warm this entire ski lodge up."

"I-I would r-roast people as a p-profession if t-that worked."

"All right kid, head to the nearest overdecorated shop that's blaring cheesy Christmas music and order a Pumpkin Spice whatever-you-basic-bitches-call-it. Don't think of this as me caring about your wellbeing, by the way. It's just that if you die, neither of us seal our deal."

"W-Wow, I f-feel so special."

"..."

"..."

"Urgh, are you trekking through snow or a giant slushy machine?"

"My entire body feels like the latter, but at least I'm warmer now!"

"Chipmunk the Snowbitch, melts into a puddle on the floor!"

"Was shitty singing a part of your flirting lessons? Because it's turning me off."

"Your face turns me off!"

"Oh wow, so original, Mozzarella! I applaud you! Let me guess, you pulled that insult out of some prank Christmas crackers or something?"

"How long are you staying at this lodge?"

"Another month."

"Dear God, please save me from the torture of the holy snowballs."

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