When The World Had You

when the world had you || 5

laughing makes you momentarily

forget about the pain

but laugher no longer comes

to me anymore.

and so the pain remains.

i have forgotten how to laugh

at a joke or a prank.

you took my laugher when you departed.

but i have found another way

to vanquish the pain.

it comes in many forms,

a capsule, a needle,

or even powder.

but it doesn't matter

what method it is,

they all get the job done.

the pain i feel is neglected.

all my emotions wash away

and i'm a brand new person.

i'm fascinated by everything.

normal objects look amusing

and i have a rush of energy.

pain is lost

i run like a child, i have a brain of a baby

and the body of a young adult

but as i step off this roller-coaster ride,

i am reminded that

i'm all alone in this sinful world.

i'm being held captivated

in this illusion

of happiness

it kills me from

the inside.

my death date coming closer.

but my desire for being alive

is gone, like you.

my new obsession are the happy pills.

but please know,

that no matter how many

tablets i take.

the world will never leave me

mesmerized as when

i saw you.