Misery Blues

Chapter 25 - Part of the Deal

I sit down on my bed, my purple sheets crumpling up around me - but I don't even bother fixing it as I glare, cross-armed at Roxas. Denton and Martin are spending the night in Denton's room - they are letting me and Roxas have our much needed talk. Roxas doesn't say anything as he paces slowly around the room, a hardened expression on his face. The silence is heavy, it suffocates me... After about ten minutes of this, I have enough. 

"Talk." I say, uncrossing my arms. "Roxas, talk to me."

He sighs and almost reluctantly sits on the side of my bed, far away from me. 

"You might not like some of the things I have to say, you might hate me after."

"I guess we will find out, after I hear the things you have to say." I say with a grunt. 

Roxas looks at his shoe-less feet, his toes scrunching underneath his black adidas socks. He grabs at his hair and pulls, aggravated - but finally turns to me. 

"I'm sorry, I haven't been completely honest with you." Roxas doesn't meet my eyes. "My last name was Rauncher, before my mother died. I took her maiden name, Dean, as my own after she passed because of what my father became. He is a famous actor, as I'm sure you know - and After my mom died he went spiraling down hill. He became a wreck, and it was a horrible experiance for me. He would bring home girls barely my age home, or he wouldnt come home at all. But when he was home, he wouldnt speak to me. Our relationship crumbled, and he started to hate me, I guess I hated him too... In the end, I did some pretty messed up things and landed myself in Juvie - this was last year and the reason I didnt go to school and had to stay back. I was scheduled to have three years there - but I got off on a deal with an old friend of my mother's whose a judge." 

Roxas bites his lip. "This is where you come in."

I raise my eyebrow, confused.

"The police were suspicious of you, well...not really you, but of David. He was seen around town, drugged out, drunk and the works. They heard he had a girl living with him, didn't know his connection to her...Didn't know if she was an accomplice. You." Roxas sighs, "Part of my deal with the court is that I was supposed to help them get people like David off the street and into cells where they belong. They were after him for a long time, but had no proof. When I first met you in class, I didn't know it was you."

"Denton and me dont get along, because when I got out six months ago, I told him that David was suspicious - he didn't believe me. He swore David was a good man who was taking care of his sister. I put the pieces together eventually, when I heard your last name and realized you were his sister. I wanted to help you, but I didn't know what was going on. I didn't know he was hurting you, that wasn't in the reports." Roxas looks up at the cieling. "But I became attatched to you, and it became so much more than a job or a way out of jail. I fell for you, and Denton didnt believe me on that either, he swore I was getting close to you because of David, but that was only partly true."

I blink, "So, you were planning on using me."

"But I didn't use you!"  Roxas denies, finally meeting my eyes. "I honestly, whole-heartedly fell for you, I do love you."

"But..." I press my fingers into my legs. "You were planning on it."

After a few seconds of silence, "I was, but it didnt work out that way."

"Duly noticed." I spit out.

"Roni..."

"Who is Beatrice, actually...And how did you get my brother to agree with the stupid fued." I ask quietly, anger bubbling up inside me. I can deal with bruises and broken bones, but the thing I hate most in this world, are liars.

"Beatrice is that Judges daughter, I wasn't lieing when I said shes the daughter of a family friend." Roxas sighs, "And I both threatened and bribed your brother..." 

"What!?" 

"I told him that If my assumptions were wrong and David was innocent, I would leave you alone and never speak, look or be in the same room as you again.."

I go to interrupt, screaming - but Roxas continues before I could.

"But I said If I was right, the only one who would be hurt is you. That If something happened to you because of this - he would be to blame."

"How..." I choke up, "How could you do that, this?" I find myself almost laughing at the situation. "If you had told me in the begining, I would have helped! I would have done anything to put that man in jail, you didn't have to make me fall in love with you for that!" 

I'm practically screaming at this point, and I don't care. Denton walks through the door with wide eyes, I know that's because I never scream - he has never seen me this angry. No body has. 

Roxas puts his hands up to try and calm me down, but by now...I don't even want to scream anymore. I just...want him to leave.

"I need to be alone." I say only about an octave above a whisper. 

"Roni-" 

"Leave." I say, a little louder. "Please."

Roxas tries to protest, but Denton puts a hand on his shoulder and shakes his head. The two of them leave my room, giving me the thing I want most right now....Silence.