That-Sokovian-Bastard // Avengers Imagines

Panic Cord - Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: 1101
Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader
Featuring: Tony Stark
Warnings: breakup, angst, arguing
Requested by anon
Summary: Based on Panic Cord by Gabrielle Aplin, after Steve broke up with you, he thinks it's about time to explain himself.
Author's Note: I rarely write angst without a happy ending, but here we are

You kept all the things I threw away. A leaf I picked, a birthday card I made

Maybe you were happy, I was bored.

Maybe I pulled the panic cord.

Maybe I'm the one to blame.

*Edited*

---

"You're looking at (Y/N)'s picture again?" Tony walked up behind Steve.

"What? No." Steve stuffed the picture in his pocket.

"Maybe you should go talk to them. It's been a few months; you guys should really talk it over," Tony tried to give Steve his advice, but who knew if he would actually take it.

"Why do you care if I go see them?" Steve snapped as Tony's voice echoed through his brain.

"The relationship ended so quickly; you guys were only together for a little less than a year. And it was blown off for nothing; (Y/N) is beating themselves up about it thinking it's their fault. I think you owe it to them to talk," Tony nodded and quickly walked out of the room before Steve decided to snap again.

Steve looked at the picture of him and you one more time before ripping it up and throwing it away. He sighed when he threw it into the trash, seeing a few memories come back to him.

Steve was the one to end it. He called it off because he didn't know what else to do; he was bored. But he would never tell you that was the reason; he didn't want to make you think you were boring. It was just the relationship that was.

But the more he started to think about it; he should probably talk to you. He felt guilty about some things he thought while he was in that relationship, and he owed it to you to at least talk about it, but there probably wasn't any fixing the connection.

So he did it.

---

He walked back and forth before knocking on your apartment door. He paced around for fifteen minutes until he worked up the guts to knock; he was scared. Not of you, but the conversation.

But you were happy to see him. You weren't very fond of him anymore because of all the dumb reasons he broke up with you, but it was nice to see Steve. You hated to admit it, but you missed him.

"You've rearranged the apartment," Steve noticed when you let him into the apartment that he used to visit daily. Nostalgia hit him in the middle of the face, even if everything did look different.

"Yeah, decided I need a change. And if I couldn't actually move, I had to change how my surroundings looked," You explained with a shrug.

"When did you do that?" Steve put his hands in his pockets and continued to sneak looks around.

"Right after we broke up," You answered, no thought put into it, "Which reminds me, what are you doing here?" You turned around to face him.

"I just thought maybe we could talk?" Steve's eyebrow raised.

"About what? I thought all the talking was done when you broke up with me," You said, with more of an attitude than you meant, but it got the point across.

"I don't think I gave you a fair explanation," Steve started, but you stopped him.

"I believe you got it across perfectly," You rolled your eyes, "Said that I wasn't 'right' for you? What does that even mean? We matched terrifically! You told me something wasn't right, then implied that I was that something? It all sounded so fake, but that's okay. I got over it. And now you're here, bringing back all the memories," You groaned and walked into your bedroom, Steve following.

Steve watched you fall onto your bed, and he looked around your newly arranged room. He had to look twice when he thought he saw his name on a box in a corner, under a few more boxes.

"I will be right back; we are going to talk about this," You pointed to your ex-boyfriend and walked back out of your bedroom to go run some water on your face.

Steve couldn't help himself; he walked over to the box and moved the ones stacked on top off of it. He opened the box and saw memories from the relationship, many things Steve had gotten rid of or given to you.

"What are you doing?" Your voice made Steve jump when you came back a few minutes later.

Steve sighed, "You kept all the things I threw away," He picked up a few things to show you, "A leaf I picked, a birthday card I made." He smiled lightly.

"Yeah, they were sweet memories. But I rarely look in that box; it should be in storage. Put it away, we're talking," You directed, and Steve listened.

"Okay, look, I'm sorry for how it ended," Steve stood up and started to put the boxes back.

"I just don't understand, and I thought we were happy," You sighed as you sat on the bed; Steve soon sat next to you.

"You want the truth?" He asked, getting a reluctant nod back from you. "Okay, maybe you were happy; I was bored."

"Bored?" You asked, eyes wide, "You were bored?"

"I don't know; I didn't see a future for us because we were doing the same thing over and over. I got bored." Steve regretted everything he had said since he arrived at your apartment. At this point, he wished he could go back in time and decide not to see you, and everything would have been easier.

"Steve," You mumbled, not looking at him, "I think it would be best if you left."

"Are you sure?" He matched your pitch and looked down at his feet.

"I don't want you to come back, either," You told him. Steve nodded and quickly left your apartment, not looking back once.

Once Steve shut the door, he leaned against the wall, "Why did I think that was a good idea?" He whispered to himself with his hand over his eyes.

He started to walk out of the building, still thinking about your relationship. He sighed when he realized something; it could have gone somewhere. You two weren't even a year into the relationship. "Maybe, I pulled the panic cord," He groaned; that was the best way he could put how he felt into words.

Steve made it to his card and took one last look at your apartment window, and little did he know that you were looking out at him, too. When he closed the car door, he said one last thing about the relationship. "Maybe I'm the one to blame," And he drove away, not saying another word or speaking your name for a while.

And that night, you threw out the box of Steve's things you kept.