The Law of Attraction [Chris Beck]

Chapter 25

                Beck didn't let go, and Alice didn't want him to let go. Even though Alice had just been given news that should have lifted her spirits, she felt as though all she had been given was a dirty secret and an ultimatum. At some point, hopefully before reaching Earth, the crew would have to know about Mark. Having to keep that a secret was already eating away at her, because the crew did deserve to know. But if they were informed, what could they do? There was nothing that could be done from the Hermes to save Mark, and having to sit around and watch him die all over again, it was impossible to think about. Would they arrive at Earth once again, and join the masses watching the news on TV, listening to ill-informed reporters make speculations about his survival?

She had to have faith in NASA, that they were in fact doing everything they could to save Mark; and she had to keep in mind that Mark was not only a resourceful man, but a hard-headed, stubborn son of a bitch. His light-hearted approach to life, his humour and his wit, it would only go so far, but it already gave him better chances than anyone else. Had it been another member, they might have given up without being able to see the fraction of hope at the end of a long, hard journey of survival. Two months had gone by since they left Mars, which meant Mark had done enough survival to even reveal to NASA that he was alive. Without any communication, without anyone else on the entire planet, Mark was already surviving, already figuring out what he had to do.

Alice released Beck at last, and sighed.

"Can I take a look at it?" He asked her softly.

"Don't bother." She shook her head. "Honestly, it's a surface wound. I used peroxide and wrapped it."

"It's a laughably loose wrap." He gestured to her hand and she glanced down; he was right. Wrapping her palm with only one hand was pretty pitiful.

"Fine." She relented. "But don't try and pretend you're not doing this because you want to hold my hand a little longer."

"I couldn't lie to you if I wanted to," he told her, taking her hand and beginning to unwrap to slightly blood-crusted gauze.

His words made Alice both happy and upset; happy because she knew he was telling the truth. Unlike Patrick, Beck didn't seem like the lying type, or the cheating type, or the type to turn everything upside down and freak out at her, blaming her. Upset because she was withholding information from him, and everyone else, and it felt as though she was lying to them. Beck hadn't really asked what the conversation with NASA had been about, but it was clear from her self-inflicted puncture wounds on her hand that it was nothing sugar-coated. She didn't want to lie- she had to.

"You know, this makes you look really tough," Beck commented as he tossed the gauze in the trash, and reached over for another role. He placed white padded bandage over the four marks where her nails had punctured her skin, and then slowly began to wrap it again. This time it was tight, not enough that she would feel the need to loosen it, but better than the half-assed job she had done earlier.