Swiftly Told Tales (Taking Prompts/ Requests!)

All But Me (Missing you) - Poem

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I'm new to first person POV so be gentle with me! Inspiration drawn from Charlotte's story featured in SAY MY NAME. 

Comment if you want to suggest me to write you a one shot of your choice!

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Missing you is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. It's an itchy sweater for school pictures, it's tossing and turning during a heated summer night, being on the outskirts of a close kinship you crave for. Crave for with you, more than you claim to know. Missing you more than you claim to know. Your world remains intact, unchanging, supportive. You do not feel the need to cling to people, to beg for second chances when we've only got this one go at this one dying life.

I've been told that the missed opportunities in life are the ones that haunt you in the end. The memories that when you're laying senile, pressed into a cotton covered bed, it's those would have's you wish you'd done different. The things you wish hadn't let decide your fate, to reign over your life goals and motivations. Yet even with a shared date of birth, you'd toot your own horn and call it victory. Whilst I, the other half to the DNA equation, am left burnt, quaking in your absence as you occasionally tried to pencil in time for your depressed second half. Not by choice, you've always rathered to be on your own. Creating your own. Living your own.

I am the Number Two to your Thing One, I am the grasping fingers grazing your passing body. I am endless trips of motion sickness, slumping my aching spine from coast to city to reach you and your world. Every beck and call from you and I come running. I run to you as you call my efforts not enough. That it's you who calls for me, who needs me, and then to blind your eyes to my undying devotion to be there for you whenever you breath a letter of my name.

You say that it's not your fault that you can't provide the same kind, listening ear to me, to be the crutch to my pain, when I need you the most. No, you explain it easily to me while tears track my cheeks, mascara running rancid, that you simply cannot understand how to express your love for me when you clearly can with everyone else.

You feel like on most days, you've done your duty and act as if I am nothing but clingy. Telling me that I have to learn to live my own life without you when after twenty years it's been nothing but you. Though again, even with a mirrored appearance, thats never been the truth with you.

You who in elementary school would spend lunch hours running away from me with my replacement, again with wet cheeks calling for your companionship. And later I was nestled in my corner of the playground, digging up rocks with another lonely friend that wasn't enough for me, yet I tried for you. You who made all kinds of friends who put up with me all the same. Sure, I'm amicable, likeable, but when you were laughing with all those friends, looking around, I'd laugh with just you, stood with my boyish clothes just at your heal.

You've had many best friends since our lives began. It was Paige, Candace, Emily, Nathan, Ali, Maddy G, Earnie E, Tanner C, Sara D and all but me. I made friends in your absence. Survival some would say. Loneliness some would say.

I would later learn that our adolescence was child's play compared to what lay ahead.

High-school was high terror at times. I've never witnessed a person so affected by horrendous hormones as the ones that shook you of your sweetness. You'd see me, your sickly stick-ly sister and vomit out your frustrations at I. Don't deny it, you simply can't, you were the Dee during your own pond jump away from me. You didn't want me sitting next to you, talking to you would arouse anger, any and all doings with me were extended ideations of what you didn't like about the earth your feet were glued to.