I'm Not The Girl You Used To Know

Chapter 14: Love Him, Love Him Not

It'd been 2 weeks since I dated Mike. He was surprisingly great and I started to relax around him. I was getting used to his kisses and his touches.

He was different than the others. He never rushed me into anything and that was what made me like him even more.

We mostly spent time together in his dorm after class. But I also made my time too with Hailey. I didn't want my relationship changed my friendship with Hailey. She was always there for me and I would be a terrible friend if I abandoned her just because I had a boyfriend.

Brian still didn't agree with my decision dating Mike but I didn't give a damn. Kira and Ethan didn't say anything either which made me glad. I didn't want them to interfere my personal matter.

But since that night I told Brian I was dating Mike, Ethan seemed to have a distance with me.

Usually, after I got home, he would greet or smile to me. But after that night, I was like invisible or trying not to be in the same room with me.

I didn't like it, but I couldn't do anything about it. So, I decided not to make a fuss about it. I had Mike and Hailey. They were enough for me.

"So, how are you and Mike?", Hailey asked when we had lunch together.

"Well, we're great", I said.

"So, are you still uh... you know?", she smirked and raised her right brows.

"No", I blushed.

"Oh, OK. I'm not going to say anything about it", she chuckled.

"Thank you", I said sarcastically.

"So, how's your brother handling this?"

"Well, he still doesn't agree me dating Mike. But I don't care. He's not my dad", I said

"But why he doesn't like him?", she asked confused.

"I don't know. He's always a pain in the ass", I said take a bite on my fries.

Hailey laughed. "So how's it going with Kevin?", I asked, changing the topic.

She started chatting about him. How much she missed him and the long distance thing was suck, she talked like a train. I just nodded and gave some necessary comments.

After lunch, Hailey went back to her dorm and I went back to the apartment.

I wanted to go to Mike's dorm but he said he had a homework which due tomorrow. I told him I could help him but he refused.

I got home and welcomed by Kira who was in the kitchen. She was cooking. She came a lot lately which I didn't mind because she was quite nice.

"How was your date?", she asked excitedly.

I saw her confused. "What are you talking about?"

"Wait, weren't you on a date just now?"

I chuckled. "No, I was with Hailey"

"Oops, sorry", she said apologetically.

"You're not working today?", I asked.

"No. I take a day off. I wanted to surprise Brian. It's our anniversary", she said as she stirred whatever she was making.

"Oh. Happy anniversary then", I said weirdly.

"Thanks, sweetie", she smiled to me.

I was about to go but she spoke again. "How's it going with your boyfriend? What's his name again?"

"Mike", I said. "We're just fine"

"Oh, great. Is he treating you well?", she asked, still focused on her cooking.

"Yeah. Why?"

"Just so you know, if he did anything to you , you're always welcome to contact Kira Lewis for law suit", she joked.

I laughed too. "Um, sure. But I don't think he will do anything like that"

"You really love him, huh?", she asked.

I froze, didn't know what to answer. Did I love him? I didn't know, really. Yes, he was great. He'd made my day a little brighter since we dated. But I didn't know if I really love him or not.
My silence made her smile in amusement. What the hell?

"Ah, I guess you have no idea whether you like him or not", she said as she turned off the stove.

I nodded. "Have you ever feel like that?", I asked.

"Yeah, everytime I dated some boys, I always asked myself 'do I really love him?'. I always thought that every guy I dated was the love of my life", she chuckled.

"But unfortunately, those boys I dated were jackasses", she rolled her eyes.

"Then I met Brian. When he asked me out for the first time, it was kind of cute. He was so nervous that time. When we dated for a few months, I also asked myself that same question 'do I love him?'. At first I don't know if I do. And slowly, I know my answer. I do love him. So much", she said sincerely.

"You must remember this, Linda. If a guy really loves you, he would do everything he could to make you happy even if that makes him the one who got hurt. He will always by your side and understand you completely. If you do feel those things from him, then you know your answer", she smiled.

I smiled back. "Thanks, Kira", I hugged.

She hugged back. "Your welcome, Linda. You can always come to me if you want to talk"

We pulled away and I excused myself to my room, absorbing what Kira just told me.

Did I really love Mike? He was great, understanding, and always there for me. I rubbed my forehead in annoyance. I didn't know really. I did like him but love?

I shook my head. What the hell was I thinking. I shouldn't be worried about those things yet. We're just together for 2 weeks.

So I decided to drop it for now and took a shower.

At dinner, the atmosphere was quite awkward since I didn't really want to talk to Brian. Whenever he tried to talk to me, I would just answered necessarily.

I could feel Ethan and Kira were looking at me too, but I played dumb and ate my food.

After finished, I washed my plate and left the room. I could hear Brian's sigh and mumbled.

I walked to the bathroom to brush my teeth. I went back to my room, getting ready for bed.

My phone buzzed and I looked at the text. It was from Mike.

I'm sorry I couldn't be with you. I promised I'm all yours tomorrow ;)

I replied

It's fine, Mike. I understand. OK. I'll see you : )

Sweet dreams, baby girl 😘

I chuckled at his last text. He could be silly sometimes.

I turned off my phone and laid down on my bed. I tried to think again about Kira said to me.

Did I love him? I think I love him. But did he feel the same way too? I thought about it for almost an hour before I dozed off to sleep.