challenge [sebastian stan]

20; r e a l - l i f e

SEBASTIAN FELT THE same pang of emotions and guilt as he read chris' words again, for at least the tenth time. this was the past that mia so desperately tried to hide from him, and he couldn't believe it. he felt the tears well up in his eyes again, and he shook his head as he wiped at his eyes.

sebastian's thoughts went back to mia, and he felt his heart physically hurt at the thought of her. had he not been so stupid, she would be wrapped up in his arms right now as they both dozed off to sleep, content in each other's arms. they would be up till the late hours of the a.m as they argued about which soccer team was better. they would be on set together, slyly finding ways to be in each other's company in between scenes, even going as far as to having secret make-out sessions in the janitor's closet. 

sebastian winced as he felt himself fill with regret. he knew he loved mia. he had loved her since their second date. and that's exactly what it was-- he was afraid of loving her. it was new territory for him. he needed that sense of familiarity. that's why he needed leighton. though he knew he felt nothing but physical attraction towards her, he needed the familiarity that came with dating her.

and he regretted it so much.

his heart clenched as he thought about his mia, possibly hurt. all because of him. he hadn't seen her beautiful face in weeks, and he missed it. her smile, her eyes, her laugh-- he wished he had known it would be the last time he'd see it for a while before he decided to break her heart.

he was about to call chris, to offer his help in any way he could, when he heard his room door open. he turned to look at a half-naked leighton in black, lace lingerie. she smirked knowingly at him as she seductively walked over to him, setting herself down onto his lap, straddling him.

immediately sebastian was about to pull away, finally realizing his non-existent feelings for leighton. "leigh, please, not no--"

"shh," she interrupted. "let me make you feel good, sebastian."

she purred into his ear, allowing her hands to roam around his body from resting on his chest, to getting tangled in his hair. for a moment, sebastian imagined mia in leighton's place, touching him, whispering sweet nothings in his ear, looking up at him with her doe eyes. and for a moment, sebastian allowed himself to succumb to leighton's advances, of course, seeing mia in her place.

yet he immediately snapped back to reality as he realized his mia wasn't here. his mia could be dead, for all he knew. and it was all his fault.

he gently pushed leighton off of his body before he stood up, finally allowing the tears to fall from his eyes.

"sebastian?" leighton alarmingly questioned with hurt in her eyes. it wasn't like him to decline her advances.

"i-i can't, leighton. i just can't." he quietly said.

leighton reached out to him, wrapping her arms around his well-built body. "sebastian... talk to me."

he found comfort in her embrace yet it couldn't lift the pain of his heavy heart. 

"i fucked up, leigh. i..." he shook his head, resting it on her head.

she looked up at him, this time determination on her face. "listen to me, sebastian, whatever you did, i'm sure you had good intentions in mind when you did it. i know you're still in that falling out with all your friends over god-knows-what, but it's irrelevant when you have me, alright? i love you, sebastian, and i would do anything for you, even if it does mean kicking chris or aramia's asses for being such jerks to you. god, i still can't believe you guys are all in such a huge fight especially with the cast being involved too. but whatever it was about or whatever it was that you did, i promise you, i will never leave your side. i'm telling you, sebastian... you're it for me."

and it was those four words that broke him. those very four words were the ones him and mia would say to each other in the place of i love you. those four words brought immense pain to his heart as he couldn't help but reminisce on all the times he and mia spent together. and those four words were what led him to finally utter out four more words that he had been meaning to say to mia for the longest time.

"i love you, mia."

  ▲▼▲  

n// alright it's about to get even more messy up in this bitch lol, so pls be prepared. and i'm sorry if u guys hate where this story is headed but i promise u, arbastian WILL have at least a few happy moments together before i bring some more drama in :) anyway pls vote & comment, it rly motivates me !! expect another chapter soon