I'm Not The Girl You Used To Know

Chapter 21: I Love You?

I went back to the apartment with tears still flowing nonstop. I opened the door and closed it with all my power.

"Hey, what's that sound?", I heard Ethan's voice from the living room. Great, I forgot he was always home.

I tried to run to my room avoiding his questions but he was faster. He went out of the living room right when I was about to pass it.

He saw my red puffy eyes. I tried to walk past him but he blocked my way.

"What's wrong?", he asked softly.

I shook my head and tried to pass him. He still standing there blocking the way making me annoyed.

I was about to scold him when suddenly he took my hand and led me to the kitchen. What was he doing.

He sat me up on the chair and he was making something. I realized that he was making a hot chocolate.

I looked at him confused and he placed the drink in front of me. "Hot chocolate makes you better when you're sad or angry", he smiled.

He remembered. That was the same words I said to him when he came to my house because his girlfriend cheated on him.

I also made him a hot chocolate. The memories made me forget my anger. Then it hit me. I still had a crush for him.

I took the drink and had a sip. It was so delicious. I drank some more and I felt much better.

He took my hand again. "What happened?", he asked softly.

His touch was different than Mike's. It was full of tenderness and I could feel my heart was pounding. I never felt like this with Mike.

"It's Mike", I whispered and a tear was falling from my right eye.

His face changed into slight anger but his hand was still squzzing mine softly. "What did he do?", he growled.

"He cheated on me", I sob letting out another tears.

He hugged me and I hugged back. His shirt was wet because of my tears.

He rubbed my back. "It's OK. He's not worth it", he said.

"I thought he loved me.", I said still sobbing.

He suddenly pulled away making me confused. "I love you", he said.

I thought he was joking. "What?", I whispered.

"I love you, Linda. I've been for the past 10 years", his eyes locked to mine.

I stood there like a statue. He said he loved me? It's not a dream, right? Wow, that was a lot to take.

"I know you won't believe me but it's true. When you made me the hot chocolate that day, I realized what I had been missing the whole time. You're sweet , caring, the most beautiful person I've ever met, Linda. Since that day, all I think of everyday is you. It's always been you", he said.

"I know you will ask why now after this whole time. I did asked Brian after that day but he was against it. I know I could just have you for myself but I respect your brother. He's my bestfriend and I'd never betrayed him"

"I can tell you this now because he's given me his blessing and I couldn't be more happier", he said taking my hand to his chest. I could feel his heart beat.

I still stood there locked in his blue eyes didn't know what to say. He just confessed his feelings to me.

"Look, I don't need your answer now because this is a lot to take in. I just want you to know that I love you so much and you're the most important thing in my life. I'll wait for you no matter how long it is", he kissed my hand and to my cheek.

He left the kitchen leaving me alone. Was it a dream? Ethan loved me this whole time and I was such a bitch to him and Brian.

OMG. What I had to do? He just confesed his love and I didn't know if I loved him or not. I just got betrayed and he came.

I couldn't just say yes to him. After everything with Mike, I doubted that Ethan wouldn't do the same like him.

I went to my room and locked myself. I couldn't study because I had headache from what's been going on. I just laid on my bed thinking about Ethan.

My phone rang endlessly and it was from Mike. I didn't pick it up and let it rang. When it rang for maybe 20 times, I grabbed my phone and turned it off.

Ethan called my for dinner and I was hesitated whether to come out or not. It would be so awkward after what happened just now.

I decided to come out and faced him like a man. He set up the table and I helped him. He didn't say anything to me which making the atmosphere getting more awkward.

He made mac and cheese, my favourite. It smelled heavenly realized that I was starving because I didn't have lunch.

We ate in silence. Sometimes I could sense he was staring at me making me nervous. I tried to ignore it.

After the dinner, he went to the living room and watched TV with loud volume. Was he for real?

He was ignoring me after what he had said to me. Wasn't he supposed to be bugging me to say yes to him?

Or maybe he was playing me? I thought. I shook my head and went to my room.

(Ethan POV)

I said it. It wasn't even my plan. Those words just came out of my mouth. Since I'd said the words, I decided to tell her everything.

Like I thought she was shocked like I was crazy. I ruined it. She must think that I was taking advantage of her state.

I didn't let her say anything because I was afraid of the answer. What if she didn't love me back? That thought scared me.

After I confessed everything, I left the kitchen and headed to my room. I grabbed my phone and called Kira.

"Hello?", she answered on the second rang.

"Hey, I need to tell you something", I said then sighed.

"What is it? Is Brian OK?", she sounded panic.

"No, Brian's fine. He's still in Washington. It's about Linda", I sighed.

"What about her?"

"I told her"

"Told her what?

"I told her everything. My feelings for these 10 years" I pinched the edge of my nose.

"So? What did she say?", she squealed like a school girl.

"I didn't let her say anything. I told her to think about it. I screwed up, Kira. She was fighting with her boyfriend, and she was crying...",

"Wait, she's fighting with her boyfriend?", she sounded happy. "That's good news"

"Hey, hey I haven't finished yet. She was crying so I made her a hot chocolate just exactly she did to me 10 years ago. I hugged her and suddenly I said the L word", I explained.

"So how was her reaction?", she asked.

"She looked shocked so I didn't let her to say anything because I was afraid of what she would say", I sighed. I was such a coward.

"I think this is your chance. She now knows your feelings but she might have doubts. All you have to do is assuring her that you're serious", she said.

"But how?"

"By your actions, Ethan. Show her how much you really care for her", she said.

"Kira, there's a phone call for you about Mr. Palmer's case", I heard someone said over the phone.

I heard Kira's sigh. "OK.I'll be there. Ethan I gotta go. I'll talk to you later", she said and hang up.

I turned off my phone and burried my face with pillow beside me. This would be so awkward after this.