Oblivion |N.H| •Sequel to Hired•

-Chapter 62

Niall's POV

Jenny was at work and I was home alone with Arabella and Mason. It was his first time in this house and I was more than anxious to say the least. I was so unprepared, all I had was some of Bella's old bits, such as her basinet, rocker and toys. I literally, had no room set up for him. Although, he's probably only going to be here Friday until Sunday so what we have, for now anyway, will do just fine.

I watched him as he lay in my arms, gurgling behind his fingers. I still could not believe I was holding my son. I was happy when we had Arabella, our little princess, but I did always long for a son - you know, to be the fatherly figure he needs. Teach him how to play football (and golf), and when he's old enough I'll teach him how to drive and buy him his first beer.

Each time I held this little boy, I had to shake off the feeling I got. I recall my first few weeks with Arabella, I got this feeling, of pride and happiness because she was little girl. My child, and she felt like my child. I felt the connection. Although, when I held him, I couldn't help but feel as though we don't share the same connection. I felt terrible, but something was just amiss.

I didn't know if it was because he wasn't mine and Jenny's baby. Possibly, I may have felt like this because when Arabella was made, she was made out of love. But Mason...he wasn't made out of love. He was made out of lust.

That shouldn't make it feel any different though, because he is still as much my child as Arabella is but I couldn't help how I was feeling. I just hoped the feeling wore off.

I placed him in Bella's old rocker and went to make him a bottle of milk. When I returned, Bella was attempting to cuddle him, although failing profusely because of the awkward position. "Aw," I cooed. "Do you want to give him a cuddle?" I asked her and she shied away. She gave a timorous nod with her hands behind her back, giggling quietly to herself.

"C'mere then." I patted the space next to me. I told her to sit back against the cushions and once she did I gently placed Mason on her lap. Her face immediately lit up as I took her arms and put them in the appropriate positions. Smiling fondly as I watched her, I took out my phone and snapped a photo.

"Do you like him?" I questioned, to which she nodded.

"Sometimes." She mumbled then. "Not when he take my daddy." She told me which made me coo quietly.

I suddenly felt quite bad because I had been spending a lot of time in the hospital with Mason while he was in hospital. I felt obliged to. I could see why Arabella could feel neglected, considering I hadn't been spending as much time at home. I just felt as though I was letting everybody else down; Arabella, for not being here as much with her. Mason, because if I wasn't with him I felt bad for the little squid lying in hospital on his own. And of course Jenny, for doing this to her and bringing another child into the world that isn't ours.

Mason began to cry then, stopping my train of thoughts. It made both Bella and I jump. She began to cry then as well, not understanding why he was crying. "Daddy." She cried as I took him onto my lap to feed him, assuming that's what he was demanding.

Once he got the bottle he stopped crying but Bella didn't. "Daddy." She whimpered again, holding her hands out to me. I knew she wanted to be picked up but I didn't have enough hands to do so.

"Bell, here, come sit here." I patted my other leg which had room for another child. It's not like Mason took up much room on my lap anyway, he still only weighed just over five pounds.

"Up." She held her hands out to me.

"Bella, I am not an octopus, my hands are slightly occupied, come sit here." I told her, gesturing to the space again. She cried harder and slipped off the couch, running past my legs and out of the room. I groaned quietly, shaking my head. God, I can't seem to do anything right these days.