Losing Kim Taehyung

one

Fingers intertwined.
Nose touching.
Lips locking.
Body heat against body heat. . .

But still, why do I feel so lost with you?
Why do I feel like I'll lose you everyday?

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3 hours before New Year's Day

"I don't feel good about this." I told myself as I stopped from walking. I'm on my way to Sungjae's house, since his girlfriend Sooyoung told me to come to the party, but I'm not really into parties. I'm just not too fond of it.

The sound of loud banging music made it worse. I could hear it all the way from here—from where I'm standing, and I'm only four houses away from his house.

I could feel the cold breeze reached my face. I shivered a little. I breathed out to see a clear smoke came out of my mouth due to the cold weather. Good thing, I'm wearing the gray oversized turtleneck sweater my mom gave me last Christmas, and a pair of faded jeans and sneakers. I reached for the collar of my turtleneck to cover my mouth to keep it warm as I proceeded walking. I'll probably die here if I only stood here, so I might just go to that effin party.

When I reached Sungjae's house, I almost covered my ears using my hands because of the deafening music. There are random people in the front yard. Some are drinking beers, some are dancing and some are already making out.

I tried to ignore what I'm seeing as of the moment, and just entered the house. When I got inside, my jaw almost dropped to see how crowded it was.

I just sighed defeatedly and squeezed myself through the crowd. In the midst of my way through the crowd, I felt my phone vibrated from my jeans. I immediately fished it out and answered the incoming call.

"Hello?" I said, shouting over the phone as I try to overpower the loud music. Yeri didn't speak for a few seconds, and so did I. I put down my phone from my ear for a meantime, and proceeded walking my way out of this freakin' crowd. Finally free from it, I got the chance to breath. I looked around to look for my friends, but I couldn't see them. There were just too many unfamiliar faces.

I lifted my phone to my ear again and heard Yeri talking, "I'm hearing loud music. Are you already here? Where are you? I can't see you." She said, shouting, sentence after sentence.

"I can't see you either. I'm here—"

"Just go near the kitchen. You'll see a green sofa there. We just hanging out here, okay? She said, cutting me off. I barely heard her, but I heard 'kitchen' and a 'green sofa', so that's good enough.

Sungjae's house is huge, but I've been here many times since we were kids, so I wouldn't get lost. In just a few seconds, I reached the kitchen and saw the green sofa as well. Yeri was the first person I saw, flirting with a new dude. I rolled my eyes as I approached them. That's the ninth dude for this month, Yeri. I thought to myself.

When Yeri saw me, she jumped out of joy and hugged me tightly. "Yeyyyy! You said you wouldn't come! I'm glad you did!"

I slightly pushed her away from her tight hug, "You three forced me! I don't even want to be here!"

"Ohh, this is gonna be fun!" She said, nudging my arms playfully, and added, "Plus, your mom has a party to attend to, you know? She also called us to force you to go to this party. You can't just stay at home alone, spend New Year's Eve in pajamas, and watch some shitty cartoons!" Shit, I've been exposed! She shook her head, and faced me. "Tsk, tsk. Even your mom is way more fun than you!"