The Lost Asgardian (Loki)

Entry 5) Beautiful Nightmare

"Serial Killer" by Lana Del Rey
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AVA

I was unsure when I fell asleep that night. I remember waking up in my dream. The adorable moment where you feel you pulled yourself up from slumber only to discover you are still deeply inside of it. You're not actually awake. There are still strange improbabilities happening all around. I knew I was asleep because I saw him again, this time, standing in the corner of my room. I woke up because I could feel eyes on me, watching, waiting.

Loki.

I don't know what he looks like in my dreams, but when I see him in a regular dream when nothing Asgard related is near, he always looks the same. His skin is a near shimmery lapis blue. His eyes are a haunting orange. Strange yet beautiful patterns decorate his skin and face, striking familiarity and yet none at all at the same time. He wears a black cloak that covers himself from head should frighten me and yet it doesn't. He doesn't say anything as he watches me silently. No expression is upon his face as he overlooks me, suddenly causing me to become self-conscious I was sleeping in only an oversized pajama shirt with Cookie Monster on the front of it. If it's a dream, shouldn't I have control over what I wear...? I ignore the thought to continue the impromptu staring session.

This isn't my first time dreaming of him. I always see the strange too-blue form of him that isn't human. He'll linger in the background of a dream regarding Asgard, watching me as if we're both watching the moment transpire. I can't unglue my eyes from him no matter how hard I try.

We watch each other for a long time. Even though I know this is only a dream, I feel a sick happiness to see him, as if having him around suddenly just illuminated a flame deep inside of me. Once, I found it funny when girls would say they were in love with imaginary story characters. I guess I'm no better. I'm head over heels for an imaginary character inside of my head. How twisted is that?

The blue version of Loki watched me quietly, eventually tilting his head to access me. Shouldn't I be afraid? Shouldn't seeing a blue man of towering over six-feet of height terrify me? His eyes are a frightening orange with a pitch-black iris in each. There's nothing human about him, only complete alien where he holds looks that belong at a Sci Fi convention. One moment he was standing across the room, and the next, he was right beside my bed, staring down at me with a pair of furrowed brows. I ignored the impossible teleportation aspect of his movement to watch him intently. "Do you remember me?"
His voice.

Suddenly, familiarity rings for me. I know it. I can now remember it from my dreams that I could never place. That familiar smooth and flawless tone, somehow possessing a husky quality to it. He's holding something in his hands, something I recognize; the necklace. Loki gently rubs the pendant with the pad of his thumb, alternating his gaze between it and my form sitting straight up on my bed. My head nods in agreement, the strange politeness in me feeling it would be rude not to answer him. "You can understand Old Norse, but what language do you speak now?" Loki asks quietly, no emotion displaying across his lapis blue face.


"English," I offered stupidly, not thinking I was even speaking a language other than English. "Interesting," he said, taking a sitting position upon my bed. I could see the crease of him sitting down upon my bed spread, making this moment look more realistic.
"I thought my anger would best me in this moment," he said in a low voice, not watching me. He wasn't watching anything specific; he stared out into space, avoiding eye contact. "Truly, I should want to rip that wretched object you call a heart right from your chest cavity."

This was the part where my face pulled into a frown. None of this was similar to previous dreams. In those, Loki was always quiet and calm, only watching me dream of Asgard. Right now, he looked resisting the urge to do just what he threatened. I was happy I wasn't standing up straight or my knees would have buckled beneath me out of fright. Loki continued staring out into space. One moment he was a monstrous looking alien who casually spoke of killing me. A few moments later, he was positively human. Something inside my mind clicked. Recognition.