Loss of Innocence

Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Arabella Baine

The following days were very surprising. Rylan stood by his words and was slowly showing me his other side. The side that I’m slowly beginning to put trust into.

He would randomly give me flowers and take me on spontaneous walks into the forest. He’d show me the great landscapes and the creatures that lived there. He also let me stay in his room. We had to share beds, but he kept his hands to himself. For that, I was very grateful. I didn’t want to take advantage of the situation though. I still do house work and we still haven’t announced to his pack that we were mates.

I took out my hair tie and let my fiery red hair cascade down my back. Sighing contentedly, I pushed the blanket open and climbed into his bed.

The sound of his heavy footsteps echoed in the halls. With one turn of the door knob, Rylan walked in with his eyebrows scrunched up and lips turned into a deep frown. Immediately, I felt a tug at my heart.

He sat on the corner of the bed and let his shoulders sag. “What’s the matter?” My hands found their way onto his tense arms. Slowly, I massaged them, feeling him relax. He shook his head, taking me into his arms and placing me on his lap. He rocked back and forth slowly and breathed in deeply. “You can tell me anything…” I knew that he wasn’t ready to trust me fully either so I reassured him, “but you don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

He looked at me with those dark topaz eyes and smiled slightly. His warm lips found mine as his grip tightened around my hips. My hands moved up and cradled his neck. He tugged on me, pulling me closer and forcing his tongue right into my mouth. An involuntary moan rose up my throat, causing him to stop and break away.

“Baby, you surely know how to get me all worked up,” he exhaled loudly. “I’ll take a quick shower then I’ll join you for bed. Did you eat dinner yet?”

“I’m really not that hungry…”

“You can’t starve yourself, that’s for sure! How about I ask Beatrice to bring us something?”

“No, it’s okay.” I knew that Beatrice had gone out with her mate. “She might be busy at the moment.”

“And why would she be?” He looked at me challengingly. “She usually finishes her duties early.”

“I…” I didn’t know what to say. Should I tell him that Beatrice was out with her mate? Should I tell him that I gave them my consent without consulting with him first?

“You what?” He looked down at me, daring me to finish my question.

“I want to join you,” as soon as those words escaped my mouth, I wanted to curl up in a hole and die there. His eyes held shock and his mouth hung open. I can’t believe I just said that!

“Oh really now? I can tell you that we wouldn’t be only showering if you joined me….” He growled lowly before throwing me over his shoulders and heading towards the bathroom. I tried to wiggle out of his grasp, but it only pushed him to go faster. “Here we are, sweetheart,” he set me on my feet and quickly stripped down to his boxers.

“I…I… I’m not ready,” I sighed out. I just couldn’t…

“Come on baby. I wasn’t really going to force you. I’ll be good, I promise. Now let’s get going!” he smiled charmingly before nudging me towards his huge bath tub. I reluctantly walked up to it and watched as he stepped in. “Fine, you can wash me then,” he huffed in defeat. Suddenly, his boxers dropped.

A sudden rush of heat came up my cheeks at the sight of his manhood. “Wha…”

“It’s all yours,” he winked as he turned the shower on. Water droplets hit his perfectly toned body, making my blush deepen. “So you won’t be joining me?”

“No,” I grabbed the soap and started to scrub his body. A small growl of delight came out of him as he closed his eyes and left me to do the work.

“You look very beautiful with that red tint on your cheeks,” he whispered deeply before capturing my lips with his once again. His other hand turned the shower off and the other pulled me against him. His warm body squished mine, causing me to gasp. “Come on sweet cheeks…”

Sweet cheeks…My mind went crazy at the sound of the word… Only one person called me that. I took deep breaths, praying that I won’t have a meltdown. Especially not in front of Rylan.

“Oh sweet cheeks…. I believe it is our night once again. Don’t you love these little sleepovers?”

My body shook as he stepped closer to me. His eyes trailed up and down, looking at me like I was some deer he was about to prey upon. His large hands reached out to me, pulling me roughly against his chest. His musky scent overwhelmed me and the impact left me gasping for air. He let out a deep and menacing chuckle which cause shivers to run down my spine.

“Sweet cheeks…Are you afraid?” his lips curved into a sinister smile.

“N-n-n-no,” I stuttered, casting my eyes on the ground. His firm hands gripped the hem of my shirt and a loud ripping sound shattered the silence. Whimpers uncontrollably escaped my mouth.

“Please… No…” Tears flowed down my face as I felt my knees buckle. I fell to the floor, gripping the edge of the bath tub really hard.

“You and I will have a little fun, sweet cheeks…”

“Arabella! Are you okay?” Rylan immediately grabbed a towel and wrapped himself up. I shut my eyes tightly, praying that memories would go away. His hands cupped my cheeks, brushing the hair away from my face. “Don’t wo-“ I was sucked into the nightmare once again.

“Don’t worry, sweet cheeks. I’ll go easy on you. I won’t hurt you one bit. This’ll be entertaining for the both of us,” his voice softened and sounded sincere. I almost believed him. ALMOST. He has given me these speeches before. Many others like him had… And what did they do?

Instead of going easy, they go hard and leave me up to the point in which I’d be crawling for days! Never hurt me? That’s basically what they’re doing. The slaps, punches and kicks never mean a thing. It was the way they ravaged my body and disposed of me that hurt. It cut me deeply and made me feel unworthy.

I was unworthy of getting proper treatment. I was unworthy of being loved. I was unworthy of finding someone who’d actually care for me. I was unworthy of every good in life.

“ARABELLA!” His voice boomed, causing me to gasp and shrink away. “I’m sorry. But you were just shaking and spacing out… I didn’t know what to do. Please tell me you’re okay,” he grabbed me and pulled me into a warm embrace. Slowly, he picked me up and set me on his bed. He handled me as if I were the most fragile thing in the world. His eyes showed concern. It was so overwhelming that I had to look away.

“I’m sorry,” my voice croaked. I hated having these meltdowns, especially in front of other people.

“Don’t be, sweetheart,” he kissed my forehead and tucked me into bed. “Now, please tell me what’s wrong.” His topaz eyes bore into mine, demanding answers. The answers that I wasn’t sure he’d be ready to hear. 

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