Fifty Shades Of Blu

Home Body Blu

Flying back to LA was such a good feeling. Summer would be over in exactly two days and I needed to start packing for New York. After my scare back in Seattle, Matthew has been very different. We haven't fought not once and if I even think I want something he's the first to jump up and get it for me.

I enjoyed it for awhile, but now I'm wondering where my boyfriend went. I went to reach for my bag and he swiftly bypassed my hand and grabbed it before me.

"It's alright. I've got it." I said trying to reach for it over him. "It's fine, Blu. I'll take them to the car." He replied and I just sighed. The walk to the car was long and when I caught sight of the car. I was happy to grab the door handle and take a seat, but of course Matthew hot on my heels, dropped our bags and got the door. I gave him a forced smile and waited for him to put the luggage in the back of the car.

He slid in the drivers seat and immediately went to asking if I was warm enough, needed my seat adjusted, all sorts of stupid things.

"Matthew! I'm fine." I yelled to him and he stopped talking.

"I'm sorry, it's just...I don't like this. You're acting like I'm injured. I can do things myself, you don't have to worry. It's not your job." I said looking out the window.

"Fine, I'll stop. I know it's not my job, but I just thought...I'm starting to think you like me better when I'm a dick to you. I'm not trying to treat you like you're injured. I mean, damn if I've really been that annoying you should've said something earlier. I was just trying to do what I thought was best for you and your mental state when it comes to your mom and everything. It is the first time you've been back since that day. I'm a jackass either way to you." He said and I turned to look at him.

"No, Matthew. It's just...I'm just being a..." I started to finish when he cut me off and stopped the car. I looked up to see my house in my vision.

"The back of the car is open, you can grab your bags without me trying to help." He said with his eyes focused forward.

"Okay, I deserve that, but I'm sorry. Okay. I don't even know why I spoke up or why it even bothered me that you're just trying to help me." I said hoping he'd look at me just once.

"It bothers you, because it's not me. You fell in love with a jackass and I'll be that, but not for you. I'm trying to grow up and I can't with you anymore." He said back avoiding eye contact and pushing my door open.

"Tell me you're joking." I replied looking at the open door. His silence was all the answer I needed.

I slammed the door shut along with his trunk and watched him drive away, from me, and us for no real reason.

Matthew

It's done, I said into my phone and I heard the line sit still. I imagined the grin on my mothers face and it tore me to pieces. How she could do this to her son, I just let Blu go again and I bet she's confused as hell. She did exactly as the plan my mom drew up thought. She's in love with a jackass whether she'll admit it or not. Even if I tried to be like the guys her father would much rather her be with, she doesn't love them. She loves me, the real me. The me that drives her insane and will give her a good fight here or there. Not the guy running on her heels. It's sad, though. Because she deserves someone like that in all honesty.

"Good. I'll meet you at your house." Theresa said through the line as I hung up.

She always catches me in a trap or at least if she brings up my past, I'm trapped. I'll never ever live that awful deed down whether it was a accident that I killed him or not and threatening Blu is not something I'll have and if it comes down to it. I'll protect her before I do myself.