when in rome ⇒c.h

four: "a praise chorus"

"things are never gonna be the way you want. where's it going to get you acting serious? things are never going to be quite what you want. even at twenty-five, you got to start sometime." —a praise chorus by jimmy eat world

after a hearty second breakfast for calum and a first breakfast for ashton, the two went back across the hallway and knocked on the door until michael answered it very groggily. "what the hell?"

"it's almost four, mike. you and luke need to get up," said ashton, bustling into the room. calum followed behind, dragging his toes on the floor.

michael stood back and rubbed his eyes sleepily as ashton started tidying up the room. he made the bed not occupied by luke and picked up the various cups off the floor, throwing them in the trash. after receiving a pointed look from ashton, calum went around the room grabbing glasses from the minibar and set them on the counter. luke was still under the covers in his own bed and sleeping. when ashton asked who wanted to wake him up, michael quickly volunteered. he seemed wide awake now.

"i don't trust you," ashton said, "but i'm not going to do it myself and be subjected to his wrath, so you go ahead."

michael daintily pushed his sleeves back and began to gently untuck all the blankets from under the mattress. once the blankets were all loose from the bed, he gathered the corners in his hands and yanked on them heartily. they flew off the bed, exposing luke, who was curled in the fetal position.

luke was a light sleeper, but a huge grump when woken unpleasantly. he snatched a pillow and tried to cover himself with it. "fuck each and every one of you and any children you may sire," he grumbled.

"morning, sweet cheeks," michael said. "it's almost time for dinner!"

ashton opened the curtains and let in the bright sunlight. luke snarled. michael winced, but only slightly.

"both of you need a shower, i want to go out for dinner," ashton declared. calum stepped past him, looking out the window. a few fans were gathered at the hotel entrance. he wondered how long they'd been waiting there.

"luke, come on. it's almost four," michael said in a somewhat cajoling manner.

"bring me some water and then maybe i'll get out of bed," luke said snippily. calum noticed that he wasn't even looking at his phone, which was face up. normally, luke checked his phone right away when he woke up. they all did.

while calum lamented this, his pocket suddenly started vibrating. he dug his phone out and looked at the screen. his eyes widened and he hurried out of luke and michael's room, across the hall, and to his own. the others called after him, but he paid them no mind.

"hello?" calum lowered his voice, trying to sound cool.

"hi," emily said.

"we need to talk." they spoke simultaneously.

"you first," calum said politely.

"ah, how about you? i always go first," emily joked. calum pictured her shaking her head while looking down, a small smile on her face.

"i'm sorry about what i said last night. i was drunk and with the boys and–and i just lost myself."

"you 'lost' yourself? calum, i thought you were sober because you can't spell for shit when you're drunk and because it didn't sound that different from what you've been saying to me."

"or you to me!" calum cut in. "i'm trying to apologize to you, em, but you're not letting me!"

"maybe because i don't want you to."

the words were cold, and calum gasped. the lack of noise over the line made him wish for static, for something to break the silence. "you don't want me to apologize to you?"

"what's the point? we'll end up fighting again; we always do. i love you, calum. i don't want to fight with you anymore."

calum let out a relieved sigh. the conversation was out of dangerous waters, he felt.

how very wrong he was.

"i think we need to break up. for...for good," emily said softly.

calum said nothing.

"please say something."

"is that what you want?" calum asked, his voice tight.

"i–yes. i don't want to be with you if we can't be happy."

he shivered. "i was going to call you. i was going to call you today and tell you how sorry i am and that i want to get back together."

"i'm sorry," emily said simply.

"what am i supposed to do with sorry?"

"i don't know," emily mumbled, her voice small. "i don't know."

but calum had already hung up.

•••••

all hype no heart