The Marauders: Year Five #Wattys2017

Where Regulus and James Went

Where Regulus and James Went

Sirius, Remus, and Peter stood in the entrance hall by the doors to the Great Hall, waiting for James to catch them up. "Hello, welcome to Che' 'ogwarts," Sirius was saying to each person who passed by into the Hall, his voice curving into a horrible impression of a French accent. "Oui, zarr eez lozz of deeleeesheees food to be sarrrved t'night!" He grinned and bowed and got loads of odd looks from people passing by.

"He's positively mental," a girl whispered as she passed.

Remus's stomach growled. He looked down at it then 'round at the other two.

"Dinner's going to start and we're going ot miss all the good stuff!" Peter whined.

"So go in then, you great duffer, if you can't wait for your bloody mate!" Sirius snapped.

Peter flushed.

"Sirius," Remus scolded him.

"What? We're all hungry!" Sirius said, "Just because he's fat doesn't make him anymore hungry than the rest of us!"

Remus rolled his eyes.

"I've lost a spot of weight this year, thank you, actually," Peter said in a disgruntled tone.

"Where from?" Sirius demanded, "You've still got it on your arse."

"Sirius," Remus snapped. "Be nice."

Sirius looked 'round at Remus, sighed, then back to Peter, "I'm only takin' the mickey out of you, mate," he said.

"Hello Sirius," came a silky, low voice from behind him suddenly. Sirius turned around and found himself face-to-face with Severus Snape.

"What do you want, Snivellus?"

"Just saying hello," Severus replied as he passed by into the Great Hall. He shrugged, "No need to bark at me."

Sirius stared at him for a long moment. "Fuck off, Snivelly." And he turned back 'round to face his friends. Poor Remus was pale white and wide-eyed. Afraid the expression on his face might encourage Snivellus to keep on, Sirius stepped between Remus and Severus. "When you wash your hair, does it cause an oil slick in your bath tub?"

"Oh ha-ha, you're very clever, aren't you? I bet you just always have all your ickle friends howling with laughter, don't you?" Severus grinned wickedly.

"How about you mind your own business instead of shoving your fat nose into everyone else's?" Peter demanded, stepping between Sirius and Severus, adding a second line of defense for Remus.

Severus's lips twitched with the threat of a smirk and he turned toward the Great Hall. "One misstep, Black, and I'll have you sent to the pound!" and he was off, disappearing among the clusters of Slytherins, Hufflepuffs, Ravenclaws, and Gryffindors pouring in for their supper.

Peter turned around to look at the other two. His cheeks were brlliantly flushed from the act of being brave and he shivered as the moment passed. Sirius high-fived Peter and then turned to look at Remus, "Ignore him, he's a fucking arrogant little twatwaffle."

"He's a fucking arrogant little twatwaffle who knows," Remus said.

Sirius laughed at the fact that Remus Lupin had said all those curse words. Sirius said them all the time, sure, but they were stil funny in that dirty-joke sort of way when Remus said them.

"It isn't funny!" Remus said, "What if he gets pissed off at us and he decides to tell the whole school?"

"Don't be going off on that long tangent again," Sirius said.