Chapter 48

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"Hey honey, I didn't know you're here." Mom said as she walked into her room finding me curled up in her bed. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah I'm fine." I replied. "I was actually just waiting for you."

"Oh, I spent a few hours later today but I thought you had to work tonight." Mom said as she took off her jacket.

"Yeah but I don't feel like going tonight. Morgan's covering for me." I told her sitting up.

"Sweetie are you sure you're alright?" Mom asked looking at me concerned.

"Yeah, why?" I asked her curiously.

Could she be seeing through me already?

"I'm alright Mom."

"You're wearing my robe." Mom pointed to the blue satin robe I had wrapped around me.

"Oh yeah, I was sort of looking through your stuff and I saw this. I was admiring it and tried it on. I realized it's so comfortable." I chuckled trying to play it off cool.

"Yeah, I know. It's actually one of my favourites too." Mom replied as she eyed me curiously making me want to squirm with discomfort. "But besides that, I remember as a kid whenever you were down or something you used to find comfort in my clothes. So tell me sweetheart, what's wrong?"

"Mom why do you keep assuming anything is wrong? I told you I'm okay." I said my voice cracking.

"Something happened. What is it?" Mom said coming to sit on the bed beside me and pulling me into her arms.

It was like with mom being here now and with all the recent revelations, I so wanted to tell her everything but I don't think I could do it at the moment, it just caused me to break down. After taking the pregnancy tests the day before and them being positive, I was so out of it. I hid from Lucas by locking myself in my room in case he decided he wanted to share beds last night. I just couldn't face him after seeing those results. I didn't know what to do or how I I would react around him.

Earlier, I had went to the doctor just to confirm whether or not those home pregnancy tests results were correct, and my biggest fear was confirmed. I was five weeks pregnant. I didn't know what to do and I just felt so anxious staying in Lucas's apartment. I needed to be completely by myself. Mom's apartment was the best place for that since she was at work the entire day.

I still couldn't quite process things. How did this happen- like I knew how it happened but still. I was on the pill, I swore I hadn't missed one since Lucas and I had become intimate. And even more, every time Lucas and I had sex we used protection. So just how-what went wrong this time? It was like a bad nightmare that I was going to wake up from, but hours later I was still here in the nightmare realizing that this was reality.

I had no idea what I was going to do. I was a month pregnant and I hadn't even realized it, if it wasn't for me checking the calendar and realized that I was late, I wouldn't have known even now. I didn't really feel any different lately or anything. The entire day I spend here in mom's bed trying to come up with options on what I was going to do. I had absolutely no idea about being pregnant or babies, and I wasn't even sure how I had felt about children. Even worst, this was Lucas's child. How was I supposed to tell him? I didn't think I could do that. Lucas and I aren't even in a relationship. He still has issues with trusting and committing, so how would I be able to drop this bomb on him? I didn't know how he would take it. I doubt  Lucas even had time to think about children of his own to how serious and committed he was to his work and Mafia business.

When I came here waiting on mom to come home, I just wanted to spill everything and maybe she would be able to give me advice and help me through this, instead of me making the same mistake she made which caused her to be separated from her family. However, the minute she was here with me as I cried my eyes out, I didn't know how to tell her that I was expecting. I had been denying anything going on between Lucas and I for months now, even though I had admitted to liking him but dropping a bomb like this now? I just didn't know how to do it. I needed a day or few more to actually make up my mind to tell her about it.

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