Coming Home // Sidemen AU (Minizerk)

2011

One year missing...

A lot can happen in one year, people grow up, move on, leave others behind; but also a whole lot of nothing can happen too. Such was the case with Josh's disappearance, meaning that he was still missing and they weren't any closer to knowing where he was. They didn't even know if he was still alive.

In the few weeks after he disappeared, the teen had been all over the news, the press hungry for a good kidnapping or suspected murder story. But after a while and no new evidence was brought forward and the case grinder to a halt, they grew bored, like vultures sulking away from a carcass stripped to the bone.

Josh was technically an adult, an adult from inner city London. People just didn't care enough to get that emotionally involved. He was probably involved in gang affairs, he probably overdosed on drugs, he probably got mixed up in some bad shit and had to run away. That was what people speculated, the people who never knew the boy.

His friends knew different of course. They knew Josh had been taken from them, against his will. They didn't know how or who or even fucking why, but they knew Josh wouldn't have left them.

Over the following year, they react and deal with the trauma of losing one of their own in very different ways.

JJ puts his focus into YouTube. School comes second now...well, more second than it was before. It feels good, putting energy into making videos where he can vent any pent up energy or rage, and people seem to find it funny when he smashes old computers. His subscriber count increases at an alarming rate and more excitingly, he starts to get paid for uploading. Maybe Josh was right, maybe there was a career in this. As far as finding his friend goes, JJ has given up hope; if they were going to find him they would have already. That's just how he sees it.

Vik puts his focus into school, determined to ace all his exams, just like Josh wanted him too. He knew he was lucky in that he was naturally book smart, and he wasn't going to let it go to waste. YouTube also became a big part of his life however, more as a distraction than anything else to start with, but slowly he begins making friends with a few others and his subscriber count slowly rises. He doesn't think much of it though. It's not going to come to anything. He wasn't like JJ, he wasn't entertaining enough to do it full time.

Not a day goes past when he doesn't have a moment when he just stops and remembers that night. His dad made him talk to a specialist afterwards, trying to help him cope with everything and it has helped; a bit anyway. He knows it's unlikely, been told in fact, that they would find Josh after such a long time, but he is still young and that hope is still there.

Ethan dropped out of school about six months after his friend's disappearance. He just wasn't motivated enough any more. People there just annoyed him. Either they asked too many questions, questions he certainly didn't have answers to, or they avoided him like the plague. His mum was devastated when her son announced he'd had enough, but nothing she could say or do could change his mind. Josh was always the best at talking him out of stuff like this, but he wasn't there. He got a job as a kitchen porter, crappy hours and shit pay, but it's way better than the whispered comments and weird stares he had to put up with before. Maybe he'd even have a job he could be proud off when his friend returned to them. He hasn't given up yet, he still believes Josh is out there and they'll find him.

Tobi became even more withdrawn and quiet during the following year, often causing his parents and friends worry when he would go off grid for a day or more. He always returned though, he just needed time alone with his thoughts. Most of the others tried not to think back to "that day" if they could help it but Tobi replayed the scenes in his head practically every day. From when he had walked home from school with Josh for the last time to when the boy had walked out of Simon's door and out of their lives. There must have been something he could have done, something he had missed. Maybe if he could figure it out he would know what had happened to the boy. Or maybe that was simply wishful thinking but he needed to do it anyway otherwise he would go insane.

On the bright side he had been accepted into university. That would have made Josh immensely proud. He wished the boy was here to go through it with him. He'd originally had Simon as his uni buddy until the blond had a surprise change of heart. Hopefully Josh would be found soon enough so he could join Tobi at uni before he finished. More than anything though, Tobi knew Simon needed Josh back. No matter how much he tried to convince them all he was okay, they knew that was far from the truth.

Simon had finished school with alright results by the end of the year. To most people on the outside it appeared he was perhaps the least affected, as friendly and good natured as ever. But to the people who knew him, he was a shell of a boy they once knew. Still, he had taken over the role of main big brother since Josh had gone. He made sure the other boys were okay and gave them advice when he could. He never felt adequate enough though. He almost felt like a fraud. He believed he could never live up to his best friend.

He was supposed to be going to university after school, with the intent of becoming a police officer like his dad, but last minute rethinking had him changing his mind and, before his family and fiends knew it, he was jet setting off to Nigeria to become a volunteer and teach kids football. He didn't explain why he was going, didn't even try to. It was just one day he was there and the next he wasn't. To his friends it was almost like another one of them had been ripped away from them.

Even from another continent however, Simon is still the driving force behind the search for Josh, every day checking the website he had set up to see if there was any news and looking through the police notes - which his dad may or may not have been allowed to give him - not giving up, not giving in. He knew they would find Josh. He knew his friend wasn't dead. He just knew it.

...

...

...

The physical pain he could deal with. The punches, the burns, the breaking of bones. Sure in the moment it was agony, but even the most painful of injuries would eventually subside. He was getting better at it also, ignoring the pain, keeping quiet as his fingers were snapped or the end of a cigarette was pushed into his arm. He'd learnt not to fight back, it only made the punishments harsher.

The hunger was slightly harder. The pain was a new one to him. Sure there'd been times when things were tough at home and maybe he'd skip dinner for a few days but he'd never experienced anything like this. He had no concept of time but he was sure he'd been left for at least a week with only water to keep him going. At least it kept his brain occupied, dreaming about food.

The worst though...the times that occurred maybe every few weeks...they were what caused the nightmares, for him to wake up from his old mattress on the stone floor, sweating and screaming, the heavy chains biting into his wrists from where he'd been pulling in terror. He dreaded those days, the days where he was made to feel like an animal more than ever.

He just didn't understand. Why was it taking so long to find him? Why wasn't he out of this hell hole yet? It felt like a year had passed but maybe it had only been months. Days had no meaning to him, neither did night or day. It was hard to tell if the sun was up when you were surrounded by four concrete walls.

He wished everybody would hurry up and find him. He needed to be back with his boys and his mum. He needed to hear Vik's dumb puns, watch JJ act the fool, reminisce on old times with Ethan, have long conversations about music with Tobi. And Simon...he just needed to see that smile, the smile that always made him feel safe, just as much as it had done when they were five years old. He'd give anything to see them.

Any day now, he'd tell himself. He needed to. If he didn't, he was pretty sure he'd go crazy.

Hope everybody had a good Christmas!