slow it down // zayn malik

chapter thirty-two // floating devices.

zayn's pov

 No one utters a single word as I stand there, stuck in a state of total disbelief. The blood in my veins runs cold as I watch Sable and Andi take off after Linley, both glancing concerned looks over their shoulders, directed at nobody but me. 

I can feel my knees wobbling beneath me as I stand there, my entire brain feeling as if it were shutting down for the rest of eternity. If only that would happen. Instead, I feel an icy pain running through my chest, making it damn near impossible to breathe without evoking tears. 

Everything happened within a matter of a minute; everything shattered within sixty quick seconds. It was so fast I didn't even have time to process it. One moment Linley's sitting on my lap, our affections intertwined, then the next minute she's screaming at me and running away. 

How did I let this happen?

I can feel everyone's eyes glued on me, waiting for me to have any reaction whatsoever beside standing here like a zombie. The silence seeps through my pores, making the situation all the more real. 

My worst fear coming true. All I wanted was to take Linley and show her that love wasn't all that bad, but instead I sent her running in the opposite direction. If anything, I ruined any sliver of a chance that she would fall in love - especially for an idiot like me.

 "Mate - " Harry's deep, slow voice appears beside me. 

And the moment his hand touches my bare arm, everything comes crumbling down. 

My legs can no longer withstand my weight, and I'm crumpling into a pathetic heap on the ground. I'm heaving, trying to catch my breath as tears fog my vision. I grit my teeth, trying so damn hard to fight against the sobs begging to be released from my chest. 

 My back arches as I cough loudly, nearly choking on my own ragged cries. I can still feel Harry's hand placed on my shoulder, gripping it tightly, letting me know he's still here with me. 

"Why don't you guys go get something to eat?" Harry murmurs to the others, who are undoubtedly watching me like the freakshow I am. 

Through the loud pounding of my chest, echoing against my ribcage, the footsteps shuffle past me, each dragging with sympathy. I squeeze my eyes shut as I try to drown everyone and everything out. 

I can't believe I managed to screw things up this badly, and I've only known her less than a week. My head spins with the intensity that my emotions have been crashing against me. I hated her, loved her and lost her all in a matter of a few days.

Crumpling even further against the grassy ground beneath my, I knock my head repeatedly against the harsh earth. Harry plops down, sitting on his arse beside me, letting me get my aggression out. 

"Maybe I'm not meant to ever be in love, you know?" I sniffle, after admitting defeat and crumbling to the ground in a pathetic heap of flesh and bones. 

Harry gazes down at me, wearing a look of the most sincere concern I've ever seen. That takes me by quite the surprise, considering he hated Linley with every fibre of his being. I thought he would be jumping for joy and doing celebratory shots the moment she left. 

Instead, he shakes his head, disagreeing with my pessimistic claim, his rather greasy curls bouncing around his head. 

"I believe the complete opposite of that, quite frankly," He says softly as he pulls his long, lanky legs to his chest, resting his chin upon him, looking like a literal puppy dog as he stares at me. Though Harry can be a little out of it most of the time, he's actually one of the most caring people ever. He can see through everything.