Smile For Me, Ressler

17

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Because it's Christmas . . .

"He's standing there for almost ten hours already. Walang kain, walang pahinga. I'm worried he might collapse anytime," nag-aalalang sabi ni Miguel.

I took a deep sigh. I couldn't read anything on Ressler's face. He was just standing there, in front of Ma'am Chela's coffin.

I noticed that his eyes were puffy. Nakatitig lang talaga siya doon sa malaking picture ni Ma'am Chela.

"He was crying all day, repeatedly saying sorry to his girlfriend," Franco added.

Kuya Kylo didn't talk. He's just staring at his hopeless best friend.

"Kylo," a voice said behind us. We turned around to face the person who called my brother's name and there we saw Ressler's parents.

"Can you please talk to our son? He only listens to you. Just make him eat something, or kahit konting pahinga lang sana," Ressler's father said, flashing a sad smile in front of my brother.

"Okay, Tito. I'll try my best," my brother said, smiling back at Ressler's father.

We watched my brother as he tried to talk to Ressler, pero parang walang naririnig si Ressler. He didn't even bother to shot a glance at my brother.

I stepped forward, tapping my brother's shoulder. He gave me a moment to talk to Ressler.

"H-Hi," I called him, looking at Chela's face inside the coffin. I really wanted to console Ressler and let him know that he was not alone in this critical time.

"I . . . I cheated on her. I f*ckin' cheated on her. And she died without even knowing what I've done to her," he said, his voice was shaking. "She was so good to me. I loved her. I really did. It was just . . . I fell out of love. We were always fighting lately. She asked me a thousand times kung ano'ng problema. I didn't even answer her f*cking question. We never got the chance to talk about it. And there she is, lying inside her coffin, dead knowing nothing." His tears started to fall from his eyes again.

"Stop crying, Ressler. They said you were already crying all day."

"I'm sorry, Chela," he said, not listening to what I've just said.

Tears started coming out from my eyes. My heart was aching. Seeing him cry like that made me want to take all his pain away. Ngayon ko na lang ulit siya nakitang gan'yan. The first time I saw him cry like that was ten years ago at his older sister's funeral.

"Please eat something, Ressler," I begged him.

He scoffed. "Why do you care? And why are you even here?"

Natigilan ako nang sabihin niya 'yon.

W-What did he just say?

"Are you serious, Ressler? You really don't know why I'm here? Are you—are you stupid?"

"Just leave me alone. It's Christmas. You shouldn't be here."

"Ress," a familiar voice said. I turned around and saw Zild, looking at Ressler.

"Come on, let's eat," he said, worried about his cousin. But Ressler didn't listen.

"You'll be the next one lying on that coffin if you continue being like this."

Ressler's eyebrows furrowed. "Just go away, Zild. Stop pretending that you care for me. You stopped being my friend, remember?"

Natigilan ako sa sinabi ni Ressler.

Zild stopped being his friend? Why?

Zild clenched his fist but I held it for him. Napatingin siya sa 'kin. "Let's just go," I said, giving him a half smile to calm him.

Pagkapasok namin sa sasakyan niya, I heard him sigh a few times.

"He doesn't know how to listen. Ganyan siya sa lahat ng oras. Sarado ang isip niya," inis na sabi niya.

"Intindihin na lang natin. His girlfriend died, Zild. It's too hard for him."

He didn't say anything and started driving.

"I have to tell you something," I said, biting my lower lip.

"Go ahead. I'm listening."

I should tell him. He needed to know. I closed my eyes and slowly opened them again.

"Ressler kissed me. I tried to stop him but he still kissed me," panimula ko. Biglang napa-preno si Zild nang marinig niya ang sinabi ko at agad siyang napalingon sa 'kin.

"Ressler did what?" seryosong tanong niya. Napalunok ako.

"He—kissed me. But I didn't kiss him back. I pushed him kasi mapilit talaga siya that time. Hindi ko alam kung bakit niya nagawa 'yon. Kaninang madaling araw nangyari 'yon, bago niya nalamang patay na si Ma'am Chela."

"What the f*ck?"

"I'm sorry," napapahiyang sabi ko.

I couldn't even look at him in the eye. Sobrang nahihiya ako.

"You did the right thing, Tam."

Natigilan ako nang sabihin niya 'yon. I was expecting him to be mad or disappointed with me. I didn't expect him to say that I did the right thing. "Look at me," he said in a low voice, holding my hand.

Tulad nang sinabi niya, tumingin ako sa kanya.

He flashed me a warm smile. "Thanks for telling me."

"You had the right to know," I responded.

He chuckled. "You're making me like you more, Tam."

"Ah. Like lang ba talaga? Ha?" Natawa siya nang asarin ko siya.

"Gising pa ba si Tita?" tanong ko sa kanya.

"Tulog na."

"Mmm, so puwede mo kong i-date?" parang bata kong sabi. He glanced at his watch and raised a brow at me. "It's 1am, Tam. Are you sure you want to have a date at this hour?"

"Ayaw mo?"

"Gusto . . . kita."

Natigilan ako at agad akong natawa. "Corny mo!" pang-aasar ko sa kanya.

"Can I kiss you instead?" I asked. He was stunned by what I've just said but when he took the time to recover, he raised his brow at me.

"Why? You're sorry because Ressler kissed you? I told you it's fine with me. As long as you never gave him your permission, it's no big deal."

I flashed him a smile. "Not because of that."

I leaned closer to him and gave him a quick kiss on his cheek. "Because it's Christmas, I have the right to kiss my boyfriend," I whispered to his ear, freezing him to death.

"Ako na ba mag-drive?" I teased him. Hindi na kasi siya gumalaw pagkatapos ko siyang halikan sa pisngi. Cute talaga ng lalaking 'to.

* * *

"Tapos mo na floorplan and elevation mo sa Design?" tanong sa 'kin ni Brook.

"Yes," proud kong sabi. "Ikaw? 'Di mo pa tapos?" She shook her head. "Baliw ka mamaya na deadline no'n ah," sita ko sa kanya pero sumimangot lang siya.

"Ikaw, Marcus, tapos mo na iyo?"

"Yeah, Graphics na lang tinatapos ko."

It's the first week of January 2014. Second sem midterm exams na ulit kaya ito kami, mukha na namang zombie. Sobrang dami kasing requirements unlike no'ng first sem. Sabay-sabay ngayon ang midterm plates namin, midterm exams, pati major plates.

"Hala guys! Have you heard the news from our department?" biglang sabi ni Niña. She's one of our classmates.

Lahat ng atensyon namin ay napunta sa kanya at hinintay ang susunod niyang sasabihin.

"Sir Ressler submitted his resignation letter this morning!"