Thorns

40 - Whitney

Whitney

Nine months later – and no, I'm not having a baby!

So, my first semester as a College Freshman! I was super excited! Brown University! My dream college! Finally, I would start a new life. Away from my town and from my old issues, with my Best Friend deciding to ditch Columbia and join me in Brown. And I actually knew my major: Internal Relations. So my plan was: graduate, and then go back to my hometown and try to change things a little bit. Like ending the gang fighting, and trying to bring equality among my fellow citizens. It was a dream... still, it was my dream. It was something I wanted just for me!

"God, I'm so excited!" Portia shrieked, and I laughed "Our first year as college girls! Our first day living together! Our first college paaaaaarty!"

"Did you tell Darren to meet us by the cafeteria?" I asked her, while I unpacked my shoes.

"Yeah. He's meeting us with Saul at one" Portia said, while she danced around holding lots of dresses, in front of a tall mirror in the wall, trying to decide what she would wear.

Saul was Darren's boyfriend. Yeah... he finally came around with that. Saul was a freshman too, but he was from Chicago. Darren had met him when he spent Spring Break with his mom and stepfather. They were madly in love and my friend was super happy.

Portia was still madly in love with Ian, who was in Columbia. They talked every day and had already vacation and visiting trips planned. I think they were the 'Forever' kind.

Another who was madly in love was me. But with life! Yes, I was happy at the fullest! I was inspired by the sunshine and the song of the birds. And the smell of new notebooks and pens!

"I'm gonna take a shower. Wanna come?" Portia asked, all bright and happy.

"No." I chuckled "You go ahead. I'll go when I finish this."

Portia smiled and danced through the door. When the door closed, I dropped to my knees on the floor and punched my knees.

Happy? The hell I was. I was broken. Into tiny millions of pieces. I was in love... but not with life. Life sucked!

He was gone. He just took off with his dad and his sister. He never answered my calls, never texted me back. One day, his phone got disconnected. So... all I knew was that he went to Chicago with his family. I knew this 'cause Mr. Medina told me. However, he wouldn't give me any other info. Carlos never talked to me again. According to Nacio – the only one that kept talking to me -, Rai had got out of the Cuervos. But everything comes with a price. And Rai had to leave town. That was the price.

So... here I stood... boyfriendless. And heartbroken. I mean... he had to leave town, granted. I got that. I wasn't even mad! I was happy to know he left the Cuervos! But why ignore me?! Why did he have to leave me?!

He told me he loved me. He made me promise to never forget it. For what?! So I would get my heart broken every day?!

Fuck him! Not gonna keep thinking about him! Not gonna cry about him every time I see 'West Side Story'. Or 'Romeo and Juliet'. Or 'Grease'. Or every time I see a drive-in movie theatre. Or a fountain. Or when I look at my bracelet. Nope. Gonna stop crying. It had been almost ten months! A little longer and a whole year had gone by, and I lived like a zombie.

I got up, cleaned my tears, punched my chest a few times, so I was wide awake, and kept working on the mess of clothes spread over my single bed. When someone knocked at the door, I had the insane wish to punch whoever it was.

"What?" I groaned at the short girl with glasses that was behind the wooden door.

"Hi! My name's Annie! I'm on the second floor! Right behind you. Just wanted to ask you, girls, if you could not walk in your high heels all day long. Some of us gotta study, you know?" She smiled, all upbeat and perky.