How To Be The Best Third Wheel

Original Edition - Tip 4: Keep on Guard

It feels okay...I guess. Well, as okay as it can get when you have to endure another class with Jameson Bryer. At least he's on the other side of the class. Far, far, away. Ms. K goes on about her summer, telling us endless stories rather than teaching us an actual lesson. Most of my classes were the same, except for english. Nobody really does actual work on the first day of school.

We have C lunch. Meaning, the last lunch. There are 3 lunches: A, B, and C.

A lunch is after second period, which seems way too early to eat lunch. B lunch is fine. It's in the middle of third period. So, if you have a boring class, you get a 40 minute break in the middle. C lunch is after third period. By this time, students are hungry animals. Trust me, don't try to buy the cafeteria food during C lunch because it's like animals fighting for the last waterhole in the African Savanna. All is not fair in love and food. I shiver at the thought.

The bell for C lunch rings. I gather up my things and shove them down my backpack. I throw my bag over my shoulder and say goodbye to Ms. K as I head out the door.

I walk to my locker, greeting people whom I know. I wave, smile, say hello, and repeat. That's just what I do. I'm not exactly popular, but I'm not that loser that has to deal with mean girls like in those cliché highschool stories. I'm a people person, with the right people of course. To most people, I do my best to be friendly, or at least respect them.

But if you are going to be rude to me, I'll happily ignore you. Do it again though? We're going to have trouble. By we, I mean you.

I slam my books on the shelf, and grab my lunchbag from the hook. Then, I go down the stairs and make my way to the cafeteria.

I glance around, looking for an empty seat among the crowd. I see a waving hand and my face lights up the sight of my friends sitting at a table, a spot saved for me.

I run over to them. "Hey guys!"

Carol is the first one to speak. "Finally! Our teachers let us go for lunch early!"

I sit down on the bench and open my lunchbox. I take my thermos and a spoon out. Opening the lid, I see that I have grilled chicken on rice. Starving, I stuff my face. And I probably look like a chipmunk doing so.

I look at the girls and raise an eyebrow. "Care to explain this morning?"

They nod to Carol and she takes a breath, probably thinking of the least dangerous way to start the explanation.

"So when did you and Mark get together?" I ask, like someone from the police department. Right now, I feel like a good cop.

Carol shrugs cooly, like getting a boyfriend and not telling your best friend is a normal occurrence. No biggie, right? "It was in the beginning of summer, he told me that he had feelings for me and I felt the same."

I tap my index finger on my chin and pretend to think. "Hmm...not descriptive enough."

Carol's eyes widen. "What do you mean? Do you want me to describe it to you in romantic teen-fiction form?" She laughs jokingly at me.

"Yes. I'd appreciate that very much." I declare, my face in all sorts of seriousness. "I mean, unless you would rather I ask your dear Mark."

I almost laugh at the look that line brings to her face. Hilarious! But, I wouldn't want to ruin my serious facade. I think I'd look pretty awesome as a detective or a crime scene investigator.

"Uh, um, okay. Well, here goes... Imagine this, I go to the school field, right? So there I was, the sky was grey, and I was practicing shooting techniques for soccer."

"Okay...tell me more." I muse.

"Then, Mark came up to me and asked if he could practice with me. I was like, sure. Then as we were in the middle of passing the ball to each other, it started to rain. Like, really hard. I started to scream since I was wearing my new cleats for the first time and-"