Saving Sawyer | ✓

Chapter 10 | We're Doing This Wrong

Chapter 10 | We're Doing This Wrong

“Don’t be afraid to fall in love. It’s the only thing that matters in life.” ― Country Strong 

“You do realize that what you did isn’t okay, yes?” Dr. Fontana asks me early Saturday afternoon as I walk into his office and sit down across from him in the comfy chair.

“Dr. Fontana, it’s really not that big a deal,” I assure my overly-dramatic psychiatrist. “As you can see, I am perfectly fine,” I add chirpily, gesturing towards myself for emphasis.

“Physically, yes, you are fine but I think we both know that psychologically, you are far from fine. Your mom pays for you to be here five days a week, not just once, Sawyer,” He reminds me.

“True, but now that I am here and am clearly unharmed, you should totally take that as a sign that I don’t need to be here every single weekday for an entire hour,” I say to him matter-of-factly.

“Well, that’s something that you’ll have to take up with your mother,” He replies, unlocking the desk drawer, which is where I know he keeps my file and that clipboard that he’s always writing stuff on.

It’s true that I’ve only been to one of my sessions with Dr. Fontana this week but that’s just because coming to them is just a colossal waste of my time. Besides, on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, I went home with Graham after school to tutor him, which is a really rational reason for me to skip out on therapy, I think.

Granted, we didn’t even study that much this week because Graham is really lazy and when he doesn’t understand something, he has a tendency to just give up, especially where Theology is concerned. In fact, if I had to guesstimate, I’d say we only spent a total of approximately two hours studying in our tutoring sessions in those three days. I’d stay at his house for about two hours each time and I’d tutor him for a little bit and then the remainder of the time we’d just spend hanging out in the living room talking and he also played me a lot of that rock music that he likes—which isn’t all that bad. He doesn’t really listen to modern day music like…whatever music most teenage boys listen to. Mostly he only listens to like, Pink Floyd, The Ramones, Led Zeppelin, Black Sabbath, The Beatles and Queen. There’s more, I’m sure, but those are just some of the ones I remember him playing for me this week at his house.

Then there was yesterday, which was Friday, and I didn’t come in for two reasons. One- I had to work. Usually, when I have to work on a weekday, I’ll just go in at around 5:30-ish, which is half an hour after I’m done with therapy but yesterday, I decided to skip out on it because I just wasn’t in the mood for it. And two- Piper, Sienna and Aspen forced me to go to the mall with them after I left work so that we could buy dresses and shoes and make-up and a bunch of other stuff like that for the Winter Formal, which happens to be tonight.

So, Monday is the only day this week that I’ve been to see Dr. Fontana and apparently he felt the need to call my mother yesterday when I didn’t show up and to inform her of my absence. Then, when I got home from shopping with the girls last night, she lectured me for a good twenty-five minutes straight on the importance of me actually showing up to the sessions. Not only because she pays literally $5,000 a month to Dr. Fontana for the sessions but also because I “really need to talk to a professional,” yes, that’s what she said.

I disagreed and tried to get her to see things my way for the umpteenth time but she just isn’t having it at all, which I should’ve expected because even though my mom is really nice, she’s also really stubborn. I mean, it’s not like I’m trying to completely stop seeing Dr. Fontana because I know that I need to talk to him. I’m just trying to cut back and maybe only see him once or maybe twice a month because I know I need to be in therapy, just not as much as my mom seems to think. Anyway though, that’s why I’m here on a Saturday—my mom made me come in to make up for the four days that I skipped this week.