You Ruddy Pickle

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You Ruddy Pickle



On Friday morning, the Marauders were goofing off outside of the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, waiting impatiently for Professor Urquart to arrive. They had knicked a tangerine from the dining hall Sirius and James were using it like a ball, kicking it into the air and taking it in turns to catch it with the toes of their shoes, bouncing it about a few times from instep to toe before kicking it back to the other one, laughing as they did it, eager to see how long they could keep the tangerine from hitting the floor. "OHHHHHHH POTTER!" Sirius shouted when James missed the tangerine and it went rolling down the corridor, James chasing after it, "YEEEEAH! WHO'S THE BEST AT SPORTSING NOW? I RECKON IT'S ME!"

"Sportsing?" Remus looked up with a smirk.

The tangerine rolled ahead of James - admittedly magicked along by Sirius who snickered as he watched James trying to catch it - until it bumped into Lily Evans's mary-jane shoe and came to a stop. James picked the tangerine up and stood upright, his eyes meeting Lily's.

"Well it looks like you lot are having fun as usual," she commented.

"Yeah," James said, "Orange you used to us playing about by now, Evans?"

Lily laughed.

She expected him to stand there and talk to her all awkwardly like he usually did. Normally, he would have stood there 'til Sirius had to call him back to attention and she'd call him a git for stumbling over his words like he would've done and told him to bugger off and so play with his stupid dog, but Sirius didn't have to call him, and she didn't have to tell him to go play with his dog... James simply turned away without talking anymore with her.

She blinked in surprise as he said, "Alright Black, prepare yourself for the most ruddy brilliant display of tangerine kicking you've ever seen!"

"Because there's such a lot of tangerine kicking to compare it to," said Peter with a smirk and a nudge to Remus's shoulder.

Remus laughed automatically, but didn't look up from his text.

James set to kicking the tangerine with several show-offy flourishes, his mouth split into a wide grin and Peter was appropriately impressed, clapping his fat little hands. James kicked the fruit to Sirius, who tried to copy the steps James had done, but he dropped the tangerine and he had to chase after it the same as James had done. "Yeah, go fetch that ball like a good doggy, Shhhhhhhhnufflalufffles!" James said, his voice dripping with mockery as he watched Sirius run down the hall, his boots thumping on the carpet.

"Are you going to Hogsmeade tomorrow, Potter?" Lily asked.

James turned around, "What? Oh. Yeah, Hogsmeade. Yeah, I'm going with the lads." He waved at Peter and Remus.

"Oh that's lovely," Lily said. She was hugging her textbook to her chest. "Are you... I mean, do you reckon you'll be thirsty at all? I was thinking of going for a butterbeer at the Three Broomsticks at some point and perhaps --"

"HEADS UP POTTY!"

The tangerine came flying through the air and hit James in the back of the head, knocking his glasses forward down his nose. He turned on the ball of his feet and snatched the tangerine from the air, mid-fall, and chucked it back at Sirius, "You bloody scoundrel!" he shouted, and he shoved his glasses back up his nose as Sirius threw it back at him again and James ducked - Lily jumped to the side as the tangerine flew past her - and James drew his wand. "Accio tangerine!" The fruit flew back through the air toward him and with a wave of his wand, the tangerine went past James and on to hit Sirius in the chest, and the poor battered skin of the thing burst on the impact and a good deal of citrus scent filled the hall as the juice exploded against Sirius's oxford.

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