Dangerous Love

Chapter 18: Psychosis

I look up at him as I feel my heart beating out of my chest and it felt like my whole body was pulsing.
"It's ok," he soothes and I can only blink up at him.
"What was that?" my voice is hoarse and I wince at how husky I sound.
"That was a simulation," Eric explains and lifts me up so I sit straight up.

"Why?" is all I can ask as images of the bear tearing out my throat dance around in my head and refuse to leave.
"It's apart of out initiation, it makes you face your fears and once you overcome them it brings you to your next fear. It keeps doing that until you run out of fears," he explains as he crouches down next to me. The lighting in this room is dim and he appears to be so close to me that for a second I invision myself leaning forward and destroying all the distance between us.

I glance up at his eyes and wonder if he's thinking the same thing. I blink back the thought as my hormones go wild at the sight of the man who I used to hate so much but suddenly I'm beginning to become quiet fond of. I begin to think of reasons I should hate him again but I epically fail at that.

"How long was I in there?" my voice comes out even more stratchy and I curse myself for being so immature and horny.
"About 11 minutes, that's a little below the average," he wraps an arm around my upper back and lifts me up on unsteady feet. Gripping his arm tightly to keep myself from falling I wonder which is more humilating, falling on my face or practically hugging him to keep myself up.

"It felt like hours," I mumble, my head only an inch from his chest.
"Yeah that's how it feels for most," I look up at his eyes which become florescent in the dim lighting and thank God that I'm a foot shorter than him or I might've went in to kiss him. That's when I realized the inches that seperated us are quickly declining as his arm rests on my lower back and mine are still gripping his arm tightly.

We were less than 3 inches away when suddenly the door bursts open and we both flinch back and stare. Matt's eyes are the size of saucers as he stares at both of us, a half eaten donut is in his hand and the rest of the donut in his mouth as his jaw hangs open giving us a nice view of a chewed up donut.
"Uhh um, I just came to..." he points to the machine that was a foot from us, "It's my turn to... uh monitor."

"Oh," I take a step away from Eric and surprising let out a disappointed sigh. Without giving Eric a second glance I slide past Matt with images of Eric and the bear daunting me in my head.

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"I mean rabid dogs were just charging at me from all sides, there was no where I could go," Bailey explains as the image forms in my head.
"Well what did you do?" Sasha asks and Bailey shakes her head.
"I mean, right as they all came at me, I just, I kinda knew it wasn't real. Then just like that they were gone," Sasha, Louis, and I all stare dumbfounded.

After maybe a minute of more of discussing our worst nightmares and living through them we decide it's best we get to bed because tomorrow we have to do it all over again. Sleep takes me the second my head hits the pillow and the last thing I feel is a small prick in my neck.

I wake up cold. Way to cold. I feel around for the thin blanket that should block out the icy air around me but perk my head up when I can't move my hands. The cot is gone and so is any sign of light around me, my hands are bound behind my back and I shiver in the darkness.

"Hey!" I shout into the echoing room and after a minute no one answers.
"Hey!" I shout again and push my legs under my legs to stand and trip around the empty room. Sitting back on my butt I tuck my legs to my chest and pull my arms over my legs so my arms are no longer  bound behind me but hanging in front of me.

"What the hell is going on?" I mumble to myself as I hold out my arms to feel for a wall or anything in the seeming to be unending room. I finally find what can be only described as a wet stone wall, I follow the wall tracing my fingers lightly against it so I don't lose myself in the darkness again.

Suddenly I feel two walls meet and know that I've found the corner, still tracing my hands along the walls I realize a soft hum. Hurrying my pace the humming eventually grew to what could only be described as the sound of water rushing. Am I near the chasm?

Metal creaking on metal meets my ears and my head snaps to the new found source of light as a figure walks into the room and I charge towards it but stop mid-step as the door closes leaving me in darkness once again.
"Where am I?" my voice echoes in the room drowning out the figures footsteps.
"Hey who are you!?" I shout turning around looking frantically in the darkness.
"What the heck is going on!?" my voice fills the emptiness once again.

"Shhhhh," the figure's hot breathe tickles my back and I feel his arms wrap around me from behind and for a split second I'm left frozen in place as I realize exactly who this is. The next movements come with complete instinct. I swing my leg around and kick the inside of his knee making him crash to the ground and release me.

The second I'm free from his grip I head in the direction I remember the door was and crash into the wall.
"Autumn!" I hear him roar from the other side of the room and frantically feel around for the door. Running my hands along the wall my hands are met with a nob and I frantically wiggle it.

His arms wrap like a snake around my waist and throw me to the ground, I grunt and fall to the ground. I push myself up, my wrists still bound and begin to wonder how he can see in the darkness. A bright light catches me off guard and I shield my eyes from the flashlight.

I can see his figure now, his slumped shoulders and shorter figure are the only thing I can make out though.
"Nate what the hell are you doing?" I growl up at him.
"You left me," he states sounding broken.
"I... just cause I don't want to be with you anymore gives you no right to freaking kidnap me!" I scream and I watch as his shoulders tense.

"I..." he stutters, "I didn't want to take you by force, I thought if I convinced you to come with me today then we could go back to Amity," his voice is timid like a child's.
"What do you mean go back to Amity? they would never let us!" I stand with anger coursing through me.

"They didn't have to let us go. I left them a note. That way no one will look for you," there's a maddening tone in his voice and I suddenly feel like I'm no longer dealing with Nate but with a mad man.
"What do you mean you left them a note?" I ask more cautious this time while the flashlight shines all over my body.
"I told them we couldn't stand it here anymore, that we left to be factionless because we loved each other," as he says these words he begins to stalk towards me and with every step he takes forward I take frantic ones back.

"Autumn," I watch the silhouetted of his head tilt oddly to the side, "we could still do it. We could live out our lives as Amity, they'll take us back. With your father being a representative, the Amity could be out sanctuary, and in a year or two we'll be forgotten here. We can live together," I don't know what caused me to snap, but I knew I didn't want the Dauntless to forget about me, and I especially knew I didn't want to live out my days with him.

"No," my voice is firm and there's no room for negotiation in it.
"No?" he laughs, "No!?" his laughter turns into something from a horror movie as it turns sour and full of spite.
"You do realize, your hands are bound and I'm the only one who has a key to this room. No one will look for you. No one will find you. You are practically dead to them! So I would stop pushing you limits before you END UP DEAD!" he screams and I realize he's completely cracked. This is not the Nate I knew, this is someone else who was raised to be kind but turned on his own mind and is now being controlled by a disease harbored in his head.

"Nate," I breathe, "This isn't you."
"No this isn't. I'm some freak these Dauntless bastards created! It's all their fault!" he screams and in a moment the light is gone and the sound of the flashlight shattering on the stone floor meets my ears.

I hear a click and watch as the door swings open and slams shut in less than a second. He's gone, and I'm trapped.